me

hey.

im confused. have i changed? have i changed for better or for worse?? why do i feel different now? does it mean that im living a new life? cant be.. my past haunts me still. i still awkward around guys. i see my gal classmates so friendly and at ease with all the guys, i can only be liddat with a handful.. i am still veri self-conscious. actually, i am getting mroe self-conscious than before.. getting more vain sia.. haha.. i kept asking elin abt which of my neoprint was nicer on msn.. haha..

okae, back to the topic..

but now, i feel so much happier in skool.. i can laugh more often.. izzit cos im no longer the one cracking the most jokes? hm.. i dunno..
but, when alone with one fren, i find that we have little things to talk abt, just the same as the past.. when can i ever be like others; quick-witted, funny, humorous, spontaneous and full of things to talk abt? haiz.......

and now i seem empty again. i just keep studying until i am tired. i get online so seldom now.. soon, i will vanish from the virtual world.. haiz..

now listening to raymond lam's "eternal happiness" ending song.. forgot the song title, and it wasnt listed.. somehow, it sounds sad.. and it's in cantonese, dunno wad he really singing.. he just sing it veri nice and slow, with a tinge of sadness.. wad is eternal happiness? wad is sadness? suddenly it dawn on me that sadness is the absence of happiness, just like how evil is. evil is the absence of God in the heart.

man, i miss so many pple from 4e'04, and oso MW. i miss them so much.. saw jasmine yong today with her sister and her sister's frens.. was at west mall, i went there to buy stationary for the preparation of the promos.. jyong went there to have lunch and den study.. she look the same.. haha, wad else do i expect? extreme makeover!!? haha, im getting diao~ed.. den she told me that alot of pple went back to fmss.. but somehow, i no longer feel attached to fairfield.. the pple i care for and love are mostly gone. gone from my company, everybody going off in all directions at different speeds.. elin is in melbourne with darren, barbara and ian lim; lp, lydia and jyong all go poly.. so many pple simply disappeared from my life practically. we can no longer meet up every monday to friday, can no loner laugh at jokes together without going thru the trouble of arranging schedules and times just to meet up for lunch and such.

everybody's just to busy for the rest of the world.

now, raymond, leslie and christian bale are hunki-licious! i think i invented a new word.. it's explanatory.. no need for me to explain, yar?

untitled

heyhey, i am not gonna put the song "untitled" here.. it's just that i cannot think out a title for today's entry..

hm.. today's pe was okae lar... did a theory test for hockey sia.. ran another 2.4km... timing improved by ten seconds.. diao~ after that i watched cherie practise jumping... haha, so funny sia.. den we went to the basketball court to watch the pple play hockey before we went on to play captain's ball.. veri funny........ june and sheryl were commenting that we seemed like we were playing in slow motion.. haha.......

den we went to lt1 to study for econs test... budden whole time keep chatting and toking and eating.. like picnic liddat.. den wanru kept toking. den i "huh" her alot.. den she took out pocky, and not long after that did nicholas suddenly appear behind her to get some pocky... veri funny.. dean brought his laptop.. so jealous, my this laptop cannot make it, so old and slow... and then i know nuts abt the network stuff, once i bring out the laptop, the only thing i can do with it is to carry it around the world... maybe i can do some diary stuff microsoft word lar.. econs test was as expected to be comparing pc and monopoly... den i at the second part den mind went blank.. haiz.. got a feeling that i am gonna fail it again lor...............okae, i must have positive thoughts.... must have.. MUST HAVE.

okae, finally pw. wah..... sian diao lar..... dun wanna tok abt it.

den we had lunch! my first proper meal for the day! haha, so happy.. was so grumpy during pw cos i was hungry and my bladder was on the verge of bursting..

haha, finally managed to tok to elin and darren online..

okae, gtg. tata.

christian bale is so darkly hot.

Army of Lovers by Lee Ryan

There's an army of lovers dying to meet you
dying to make your acquaintance

It could be you
Or it could be me
So dont let go because i need you so

I'm yours
and you are mine
Theres something about you baby
I wanna hold you tonight

Accidents happen strangest of places
How can they happen at all?
Look for the turning, something or nothing
I wont let go because i need you so

I'm yours
and you are mine
There's something about you baby
I wanna hold you tonight

Everytime i see you you complete my life
Gotta find an answer
Stay with me tonight
stay with me
oh baby
wont you stay with me
stay with me

Theres an army of lovers dying to meet you
Dying to make your acquaintance




woohoo! i foun the song of my current dreams!! it's sooooo nice..

hm, update abt this week

hehe, didnt know that the stoopid com had deleted my entry on wednesday... so i gotta recap even further..

monday, it was a long day. 8am to 5pm. worse, it got delayed and ended at 5.30 pm in the end. bcos we had physics practical.. but it was fun and cute... we had to do an oscillation experiment.. so funny, danny actually did something ridiculous that i can never find the words to describe..

tuesday, quite a normal day. only the nite had me fuming mad. okae, not really fuming mad. just pissed... seems like everytime got pw meeting den i super easily irritated by a guy. alvin. we were supposed to have an online meeting at ten. nobody objected. nobody at the time in skool said that they couldnt make it. in the end, alvin told sheryl/june that he COULDNT MAKE IT. wahhhh......... den i at first nvm. i forgot abt it. den, june said that he lost her survey results. and there were many other things that he didnt do which finally triggered my temper. i swiftly changed my nick to "eunice :: angry" and i kept quiet for a looong time during the pw meeting..

wednesday. pe was soooo fun!!! haha, at first we played hockey.. den nicholas went tot of the time he kana knocked by the stick at the lower lip den he jokingly said that he scared... so poor thing... budden i still got laugh at him lar.. hehe, evil me.. jun tat was the captain, zhi kai was the goalkeeper.. so after one goal from the opponent, zhi kai laid down on the floor to block the entire goal.. hahaha.. he looked like the male version of lil mermaid.. den we play handball, i remember that my teammates included were sheryl, june, me, nicholas, khai boon and zhi kai... maybe i remembered wrongly.. but i do remember nicholas passing me the ball once.. that was a miracle since he is so tall and that the guys rarely pass balls to gals.. den actually my team could win, but the gals only liked playing slamdunk, so everytime cannot aim at the cones properly [we were to hit the cones down aith the ball to score a point]... got once the ball almost got into the basket in the basketball court instead of it being aimed at the cones... in the end, my team only got one time in getting the cone down... that's great! at least we scored one point..

den came econs lecture. the bell rang so i kinda chiong-ed to the lecture theatre, without the others cos i wanted to wear my skirt in the toilet and wash my face and make my hair neater.. den when i got into the lt, i only saw three guys from my class sitting at the right-hand corner of the lt.. den we all got the shock look, i think.. den i just continue walking up the steps to my seat after getting shocked that they were so punctual.. den i saw nicholas at the door too.. hehe, apparently, we had opened the door in unision and it looked quite a scene for the guys.. haha.. hm, toking abt nicholas, he got those pair of legs gals can die for [if only he shaved], and he got the broad shoulders that look veri comfy for gals when thy are looking for a shoulder to cry on.. and sometimes, even though he is one year older than us, he can look veri boyish.. haha..

thursday. nothing much happened, but ms soo told me that she wanted to submit my file for checking... hm, seems like she only target me.. sad sia.. budden i shall strive to make it neat and nice so as to not disappoint her.. and i want a nice mark for my file too..

friday.... hm....... lemme think wad outstanding thing happened. ah... alvin hit my head at the end of skool... so i retaliated and den i saw his handphone's dangling thing hanging out of his pants pocket.. so i snatched it and out came the hp.. den i took it... haha.. accidentally pinched him, though.. and his thigh is veri hard. wow.. den he didnt attempt to take it back and walked off with sheryl.. hehe, had it with me for a long time sia.. den i gave up looking for him and called june using his phone to get his locker combination to open the locker and put the hp inside.. den i got it, june said that i veri clever to use his phone.. haha... den i went for cca... quite diao~ i was reading the book almost the whole time after they decided the colour of the cca shirt which will only come out next year.. den we fussed over the cca logo.. gotta present the book next friday.. haiz.. after that went home with yanshan and xuanhe, both are from the rc..

today, i studied physics - oscillation... quite fun, but the calculating part and the explanation part got some difficulty.. gotta go thru that with the teacher in class on monday... okae, i gotta go do filing le, tata!!!


christian bale is a yummy married man!!

thursday

yay!

i can blog! for a while only.. wanna go back to my work later... now i veri hardworking leh, veri motivated to study
liddat, as if studying became my pastime.. haha..

hey, how ar? i think i am falling into the abyss of infatuation again. oh no.



christian bale is sooooooo hot and oooooh, so black in his bat suit.

hey!!!!!! missed me??

hehe.... i missed blogging.. erm.. not really.... super busy le... now veri stressed.... my physics super lagging... must really buck up lor...... howhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhowhow???? and my "progress report" -stoopidname- states that i have 43.6% for physics.... ah!!!!!!!!!! howhowhowhowhow??? my mother's gonna either kill me with her words, or with her brute strength... haiz... howhowhow?? my gp got 58%.. chinese got 60++.. the rest i too tired to recall..... update you next time..... ah!!!!!! i gotta work harder and smarter for physics and econs.........

so i am gonna stop blogging for a veri long time.. hehe.. so far, wad i have not blogged abt is the fairfield dinner, wanru's case and pw...

the dinner at fairfield was omgly bad in terms of food. the service.. i dun even recall waiters/waitresses walking around.. cos it's a buffet dinner.. they werent prepared enough in getting plates, forks and knife, etc. in the end they gave styrofoam plates and plastic forks. wah liao, we pay $50 for this slipshot work!?!?!? but the socialising part was fun... during the service, we went to the toilet and took photos -diao, take pics in the toilet, of all places sia..- den the dinner, mw was tokin and toking.... he tok until it reminds me of a dinner where they auction stuff and he's the bidder.. and he looked chubbier.. so cute! and he cut hair too.. but still the same hair style.. he wore gray shirt and blackish tie with black pants, of course.. new shirt.

during the dinner, ms toh sang for us.. den 4e pple all took roses from their tables -garden setting, so they put flowers at each table to create the "ambience"- and gave it to her.. i was kinda worried that she get pricked by the thorns... but the pple had shown effort in trimming the roses and removing the thorns... lucky ms toh.. haha.. oh yar, david said that my outfit was "sexy". diao lor....... i wore long sleeved shirt and pants.. just that my shirt unbuttoned until quite low, or else i suffocate..

at the end of the dinner, he disappeared. haiz. couldnt find him. but luckily, i recorded his voice into my phone. so can hear him tok at times.. haha, i psycho.

okae, as for wanru's case. she kinda felt that "life sucks". her msn nick said so.. and i dunno how to help her.. oso, she likes to tok... esp during lectures... and lecture is the time i am either stoning and wanna be with myself, or trying to catch wad the econs teacher was saying.. i expect NO disturbances.. and there she is hitting my hand to get my attention and getting grunts from me as response. and now pj got alot of talkative gals around me... during physics lecture they tok. econs lecture, either wanru or shandy and jialing tok. so i end up being super pissed. cant study with pple toking. im easily distracted, so i cant have noise around me.. and somehow, i can tahan guys but cannot tahan gals toking... oh!! i know why le.. the guys do not gossip abt other guys and gals, abt eyebrows, etc.. they oso know the limit to my patience. the gals dun. and the jokes the guys crack are different from gals' ones.. guys' are those horny, but veri funny ones.. jokes that will lighten my mood. i dun want those jokes that wanru cracks during lectures somehow.. oh yar, and i honestly do not find the jokes that the lecturers crack as "funny". not at all. and there are pple laughing at mr tay's jokes.. okae lar, he veri cute, as in the old but adorable kind.. and when he cracks jokes, his face will have that innocent look and he will tok slowly. but i do not find the jokes as allowances to get distracted and let pple continue toking abt those jokes. i just wanna study! for heaven's sake, laugh to yourselves! the teacher is giving some impt notes that we will need okae!? the laughing will drown out the lecturer's voice one leh..

okae, pw. i got supper pissed 1 hour after the meeting commenced on this mon. i dun like pple playing games with others when the group members need help. the group got 5 pple. 2 were playing finger games with another classmate. one was piao-ing but she came back to pw-world.. and another was veri anxious to get her questions answered. the last one was me. i was racking my brains and thinking abt the entire process of the pw... and there they were laughing at the game they were enjoying. i got so bloody pissed that i left immediately without saying a word. couldnt trust myself to speak lest i shouted or cried. i always cry when i am on the verge of breaking down from anger. as in i get angry. i keep quiet. den pple tok to me. den my voice will tremble. den i will feel my eyes clouded. den i dun feel like toking.

but luckily, the pw meeting yesterday was more successful. nobody was playing! yay! we finally got down to business!! but there some disagreements and misunderstandings.. and pple just cut into each other's sentences... that is BLOODY RUDE. i hate pple cutting into my sentences, or other pple's sentences. i extremely hate that.


okae, i gtg. veri tired and i gotta do some book review and my job in pw. tata.

christian bale is HOT.