i grew up listening to this song.
爱如潮水 by 张信哲
不问你为何流眼泪
不在乎你心里还有谁
且让我给你安慰
不论结局是喜是悲
走过千山万水
在我心里你永远是那么美
既然爱了就不后悔
再多的苦我也愿意背
我的爱如潮水
爱如潮水将我向你推
紧紧跟随
爱如潮水它将你我包围
我再也不愿见你在深夜里买醉
不愿别的男人见识你的妩媚
你该知道这样会让我心碎
答应我你从此不在深夜里徘徊
不要轻易尝试放纵的滋味
你可知道这样会让我心碎
既然爱了就无怨无悔
再多的苦我也愿意背
我的爱如潮水
爱如潮水将我向你推
紧紧跟随
爱如潮水它将你我包围
27 October 2007
从开始到现在
by Zhang Xin Zhe
如果这是最后的结局
为何我还忘不了你
时间改变了我们告别了单纯
如果重缝也无法继续
失去才算是永恒
惩罚我的认真是我太过天真
难道我就这样过我的一生
我的吻注定吻不到最爱的人
为你等从一开始盼到现在也同样落得不可能
难道爱情可以转交给别人
但命运注定留不住我爱的人
我不能我怎么会愿意承认你是我不该爱的人
如果再见是为了再分
失去才算是永恒
一次新的记忆为何还要再生
难道我就这样过我的一生
我的吻注定吻不到最爱的人
为你等从一开始盼到现在也同样落得不可能
难道爱情可以转交给别人
但命运注定留不住我爱的人
我不能我怎么会愿意承认你是我不该爱的人
拿什么作证
从未想过爱一个人
需要那么残忍才证明爱得深
this song was the chinese version of a veri veri famous korean drama serial theme song.. you know bae yoong jun? i hope i spelt his name properly. he was the lead actor.
this song is so damned sad. the story is oso veri sad.
it's a story of a couple. they knew each other in high skool and were abt to tell each other abt them liking each other. so they arranged a date and a place. but midway, the guy met an accident on the road and everybody tot he died.
truth was, his mama whisked him away. he had lost his memory and his mother didnt intend for him to get the memories back. bcos he was an illegitimate child and had a sad childhood. so, might as well, she inserted memories into him. she created memories of him studying somewhere else, had a happy life and such.
while he was having his new life, the gal was dwelling in her sadness.
years later, they met again. but the guy couldnt recognise the gal. then there were twists and turns and the guy regained his memory, AFTER another car accident. but the second car accident oso made him lose his sight. and finally, when the guy was blind, the couple reunited.
my sis bought jeff chang's cd album which had this song. but suddenly, the album just disappeared. bleh. sian. we both were agreived. heh. but i got the feeling that my bro took it and gave it to one of his gfs~ dunno.
recently, i have been having sleepless nites. toss and turn, toss and turn, forcibly closing my eyes and tried to control my wandering thoughts. but somehow, i couldnt stop thinking. last nite was worst. i hope i can sleep easier tonite.
i think that if i get those wandering thoughts again, im gonna cry. cry, not bcos im losing my beauty sleep. cry, bcos the thoughts cant help in my situation, but onli worsen it.
dammit, i cannot cry again! just cried yesterday bcos of my mama. i dun bother to count how many times i've cried anymore. cry cry cry. all for the same few reasons. all out of self-pity. dammit, i hate it when i self-pity myself. but somehow, that's the onli way i get consolation. the tears will carry the pain and flow out. out of my mind, out of my heart. cant depend on anybody for consolation. can onli depend on myself. if we can depend on others, why are there still pple committing suicide? why are there still pple suffering from depressions? why the hell did leslie have to suffer a 16-yr long depression and finally end it with death? will i end up to be like him? i dun think so. he's much more lovable. there're pple still thinking of him even though he died 4 years ago. i will never forget 1 April 2003. i will never forget how beautiful his funeral van. it had been fully-covered by his favourite flower: white blossoms.
i want mine to be decorated with the 7 colours of the rainbow. red orange yellow green blue indigo violet. i want to be cremated. well, i will be cremated. as for the coloumbarium, i want to be at the one where my grandfather is. it's a rather nice place, quiet and peaceful. as for the funeral songs, just turn on the radio and tune in to 987fm. that would suffice. i love their songs. i love the deejays. and den my funeral pic. well, i have a rather nicely taken passport photo in my wallet, you peeps can use it. still got wad ah? dunno oredi. i insist that my funeral be held in my block's void deck. the provision shop uncle and auntie can protest until they lose their voices, i want to have my funeral in my own block. and let the stray cats attend. i love them as well. especially the greyish blue-eyed cat who had been with me since i was primary 4. well, if i live longer than her, den nvm. let the cats come. as for stray dogs, i think they're too big, dun let them in lest they sneak open my coffin and steal my bones. as for funeral flowers, i dun want chrysanthemums. i want......jasmine. my mother loves jasmine flowers. i think jasmine flowers smell veri nice. and they're cheap enough. rose is too expensive.
okae, enough talk abt my funeral. but i had to talk abt it. wad if i die tmw and everybody's at a loss at wad i want for my funeral?
by Zhang Xin Zhe
如果这是最后的结局
为何我还忘不了你
时间改变了我们告别了单纯
如果重缝也无法继续
失去才算是永恒
惩罚我的认真是我太过天真
难道我就这样过我的一生
我的吻注定吻不到最爱的人
为你等从一开始盼到现在也同样落得不可能
难道爱情可以转交给别人
但命运注定留不住我爱的人
我不能我怎么会愿意承认你是我不该爱的人
如果再见是为了再分
失去才算是永恒
一次新的记忆为何还要再生
难道我就这样过我的一生
我的吻注定吻不到最爱的人
为你等从一开始盼到现在也同样落得不可能
难道爱情可以转交给别人
但命运注定留不住我爱的人
我不能我怎么会愿意承认你是我不该爱的人
拿什么作证
从未想过爱一个人
需要那么残忍才证明爱得深
this song was the chinese version of a veri veri famous korean drama serial theme song.. you know bae yoong jun? i hope i spelt his name properly. he was the lead actor.
this song is so damned sad. the story is oso veri sad.
it's a story of a couple. they knew each other in high skool and were abt to tell each other abt them liking each other. so they arranged a date and a place. but midway, the guy met an accident on the road and everybody tot he died.
truth was, his mama whisked him away. he had lost his memory and his mother didnt intend for him to get the memories back. bcos he was an illegitimate child and had a sad childhood. so, might as well, she inserted memories into him. she created memories of him studying somewhere else, had a happy life and such.
while he was having his new life, the gal was dwelling in her sadness.
years later, they met again. but the guy couldnt recognise the gal. then there were twists and turns and the guy regained his memory, AFTER another car accident. but the second car accident oso made him lose his sight. and finally, when the guy was blind, the couple reunited.
my sis bought jeff chang's cd album which had this song. but suddenly, the album just disappeared. bleh. sian. we both were agreived. heh. but i got the feeling that my bro took it and gave it to one of his gfs~ dunno.
recently, i have been having sleepless nites. toss and turn, toss and turn, forcibly closing my eyes and tried to control my wandering thoughts. but somehow, i couldnt stop thinking. last nite was worst. i hope i can sleep easier tonite.
i think that if i get those wandering thoughts again, im gonna cry. cry, not bcos im losing my beauty sleep. cry, bcos the thoughts cant help in my situation, but onli worsen it.
dammit, i cannot cry again! just cried yesterday bcos of my mama. i dun bother to count how many times i've cried anymore. cry cry cry. all for the same few reasons. all out of self-pity. dammit, i hate it when i self-pity myself. but somehow, that's the onli way i get consolation. the tears will carry the pain and flow out. out of my mind, out of my heart. cant depend on anybody for consolation. can onli depend on myself. if we can depend on others, why are there still pple committing suicide? why are there still pple suffering from depressions? why the hell did leslie have to suffer a 16-yr long depression and finally end it with death? will i end up to be like him? i dun think so. he's much more lovable. there're pple still thinking of him even though he died 4 years ago. i will never forget 1 April 2003. i will never forget how beautiful his funeral van. it had been fully-covered by his favourite flower: white blossoms.
i want mine to be decorated with the 7 colours of the rainbow. red orange yellow green blue indigo violet. i want to be cremated. well, i will be cremated. as for the coloumbarium, i want to be at the one where my grandfather is. it's a rather nice place, quiet and peaceful. as for the funeral songs, just turn on the radio and tune in to 987fm. that would suffice. i love their songs. i love the deejays. and den my funeral pic. well, i have a rather nicely taken passport photo in my wallet, you peeps can use it. still got wad ah? dunno oredi. i insist that my funeral be held in my block's void deck. the provision shop uncle and auntie can protest until they lose their voices, i want to have my funeral in my own block. and let the stray cats attend. i love them as well. especially the greyish blue-eyed cat who had been with me since i was primary 4. well, if i live longer than her, den nvm. let the cats come. as for stray dogs, i think they're too big, dun let them in lest they sneak open my coffin and steal my bones. as for funeral flowers, i dun want chrysanthemums. i want......jasmine. my mother loves jasmine flowers. i think jasmine flowers smell veri nice. and they're cheap enough. rose is too expensive.
okae, enough talk abt my funeral. but i had to talk abt it. wad if i die tmw and everybody's at a loss at wad i want for my funeral?
25 October 2007
yes. no more feverish feeling. but i took a real long time to fall asleep last nite. bcos of that nagging headache which took a turn for the worse after i made a trip to the kitchen to drink some water. every step i took made the ache get worse. and i tot of quite a number of things while trying to sleep. im the type who will think and think and not sleep. otherwise im to sleep and not think at all. tot abt work, money, and affairs of the heart. alex dear hasnt been contacting me, besides the time when he notified me abt the ST articles yesterday via sms.
and wow, managed to maintain an sms chat with sugarbro of 4 smses last nite! 2 from each party. haha, he's simply too busy and im simply of no importance to anybody.
this morning, i tried to wake up at 10am.. but once i moved my head, the headache just came back. so i stayed in bed. and fell asleep. heh.. until 11 plus.. the headache subsided a lil.. now as i blog, there's still this ache. bleh.
now got the urge to puke as well. budden i dun wanna puke out my chicken rice! so nice la!
and my joints ached. everytime i think abt aching joints, i think abt dengue fever. freaks me out.
and wow, managed to maintain an sms chat with sugarbro of 4 smses last nite! 2 from each party. haha, he's simply too busy and im simply of no importance to anybody.
this morning, i tried to wake up at 10am.. but once i moved my head, the headache just came back. so i stayed in bed. and fell asleep. heh.. until 11 plus.. the headache subsided a lil.. now as i blog, there's still this ache. bleh.
now got the urge to puke as well. budden i dun wanna puke out my chicken rice! so nice la!
and my joints ached. everytime i think abt aching joints, i think abt dengue fever. freaks me out.
i think i should blog abt the most happening day of last week: sunday.
brought khaiboon down to office. hey! it's always fun to see pple look surprised when exposed to high high salary ranges. sugarbro was saying that his commission is so high, so high. even his 57k excluded his GP payouts. means with the payouts, he actually received 57,000 + [13 x 1,000] = 70,000. that $1,000 payout is an under-estimation. pple get around 1,100 to 1,200 actually.
and then suddenly, the man i have never seen but heard many times before appeared behind me. MR CHARLES! [not MR JP, i think i've seen him once before. there was this man leaving office who looked veri much like the JP in the poster]
wah, mr charles..... so shuai. as in.....veri shuai.
look at this pic in friendster at http://www.friendster.com/photos/4247869/0/313131282
pose until so shuai beside his BMW Z4.
i think im fatally attracted to men with spikey eyelashes in blazers. alex! quick! grab your blazer!
and veri cute la. he come in, sugarbro greeted him so i followed suit. den mr charles looked delightedly surprised - maybe cos we never met, never toked and yet i know his name, of course i know his name, sugarbro JUST greeted him. den mr charles went to the seat where sugarbro was in and started looking for his own blazer.. so funny, as if the cubicle was their wardrobe sia, the BRMs put their blazers in office~ sugarbro's blazer will always be in his car when he's not wearing it. and den mr charles gave a brief motivational talk to khaiboon and wahhhhh, part of his monthly commission which is generated from the amt of sales made by his downlines alone, is S$30,000. it's a small part of commission and he doesnt have to lift a single finger to get that amt, besides the previous efforts of getting good downlines.
and wah, mr charles is married to a gal called eunice. HAHA~ that eunice is not this eunice. but that eunice is a veri lucky gal.
after that, mr charles left. after that, talk talk talk. and finally end and i brought khaiboon down, talk talk talk. den i went back up to office to tok to sugarbro for a while. and when i told him that i was going to sing k, he told me not to get drunk. bleh. when did i get drunk? besides that time at sheryl's chalet when i was near-drunk. i could walk in a straight line!
den we went to our rightful destinations. sugarbro went home, the place where he was supposed to stay put for the whole of sunday as instructed by his mama. apparently, he defied his mama's orders.
i went to causeway point's partyworld. the vodkas there sux. dun ever ever drink vodka orange/lime there. sux to the core. but there was this cute and blur-looking waiter.. he look so blur la! but he was veri helpful. he lent me their lighter, and den helped to get me some paper plates for shandy's bday cake when i onli asked for paper napkins.. so nice rite? maybe i should have done their customer survey and commended him [but i dunno whether they do have a customer survey~].
and shandy looked veri happy. ;]]] well, she sang a lot of songs~
i sang some songs, cried at one or two cos i tot that it really played out wad was in my heart.
den we took photos~ and dammit, i owe a lot of birthday money. wah liao. HEH~
brought khaiboon down to office. hey! it's always fun to see pple look surprised when exposed to high high salary ranges. sugarbro was saying that his commission is so high, so high. even his 57k excluded his GP payouts. means with the payouts, he actually received 57,000 + [13 x 1,000] = 70,000. that $1,000 payout is an under-estimation. pple get around 1,100 to 1,200 actually.
and then suddenly, the man i have never seen but heard many times before appeared behind me. MR CHARLES! [not MR JP, i think i've seen him once before. there was this man leaving office who looked veri much like the JP in the poster]
wah, mr charles..... so shuai. as in.....veri shuai.
look at this pic in friendster at http://www.friendster.com/photos/4247869/0/313131282
pose until so shuai beside his BMW Z4.
i think im fatally attracted to men with spikey eyelashes in blazers. alex! quick! grab your blazer!
and veri cute la. he come in, sugarbro greeted him so i followed suit. den mr charles looked delightedly surprised - maybe cos we never met, never toked and yet i know his name, of course i know his name, sugarbro JUST greeted him. den mr charles went to the seat where sugarbro was in and started looking for his own blazer.. so funny, as if the cubicle was their wardrobe sia, the BRMs put their blazers in office~ sugarbro's blazer will always be in his car when he's not wearing it. and den mr charles gave a brief motivational talk to khaiboon and wahhhhh, part of his monthly commission which is generated from the amt of sales made by his downlines alone, is S$30,000. it's a small part of commission and he doesnt have to lift a single finger to get that amt, besides the previous efforts of getting good downlines.
and wah, mr charles is married to a gal called eunice. HAHA~ that eunice is not this eunice. but that eunice is a veri lucky gal.
after that, mr charles left. after that, talk talk talk. and finally end and i brought khaiboon down, talk talk talk. den i went back up to office to tok to sugarbro for a while. and when i told him that i was going to sing k, he told me not to get drunk. bleh. when did i get drunk? besides that time at sheryl's chalet when i was near-drunk. i could walk in a straight line!
den we went to our rightful destinations. sugarbro went home, the place where he was supposed to stay put for the whole of sunday as instructed by his mama. apparently, he defied his mama's orders.
i went to causeway point's partyworld. the vodkas there sux. dun ever ever drink vodka orange/lime there. sux to the core. but there was this cute and blur-looking waiter.. he look so blur la! but he was veri helpful. he lent me their lighter, and den helped to get me some paper plates for shandy's bday cake when i onli asked for paper napkins.. so nice rite? maybe i should have done their customer survey and commended him [but i dunno whether they do have a customer survey~].
and shandy looked veri happy. ;]]] well, she sang a lot of songs~
i sang some songs, cried at one or two cos i tot that it really played out wad was in my heart.
den we took photos~ and dammit, i owe a lot of birthday money. wah liao. HEH~
24 October 2007
today's straits times featured 2 articles regarding sunshine.
immediately after reading them, i tore them......out to keep them. well, it's not everyday that your company gets media coverage. some more it's on the prime page! but the reason why it was featured isnt veri nice. but hey, my sis said she read it and didnt understand a single thing and advised me to maintain my phantom status in sunshine~ phantom as in no bring in a single sales, go office occasionally for groupings and such, otherwise to bring in prospectus..
rite now, i feel tortured. i hate it when im so damn vulnerable. shouldnt have started a single thing. shouldnt have met any online guys. i met one and i fell in love with him. met another one and im in a relationship with him. seems like i cant find a guy by myself - information technology leverages my relationship eh?
and the song by vanessa hudgens, it's actually displaying my thoughts on the computer screen.
suddenly, i wanna end everything and start anew. if there's a refresh button in my life, i wont hesitate to press it. even if it means gg thru the dark periods of my secondary skool life again. damn, the shadows of my past may never fade away, but so will the light which casts the shadows.
if i could go back in time, i wouldnt meet sugarbro. den i wouldnt be exposed to such high salary ranges and extraordinary pple. i'd rather continue toking to him on the phone till the wee hours. at least i wont be so stressed like i am now.
maybe if that happened, maybe the tears wouldnt have started on my bday.
if i could go back in time, i wouldnt say yes to alex so soon. den at least on my bday, i wouldnt shed more tears than i had.
if i could go back in time, i would directly stop myself in falling in love with that guy. at least i wont be so tong ku. it's just so damn painful and tiring.
but i know.
i cant go back in time.
i can onli move forward now. even if every step i take will increase the pain in my heart. I HAVE TO MOVE ON, don't i?
even if every single step brings more tears, at least im moving forward rite?
damn, why does my blog sound so depressing again?
or is it always that depressing to read my depressing posts?
immediately after reading them, i tore them......out to keep them. well, it's not everyday that your company gets media coverage. some more it's on the prime page! but the reason why it was featured isnt veri nice. but hey, my sis said she read it and didnt understand a single thing and advised me to maintain my phantom status in sunshine~ phantom as in no bring in a single sales, go office occasionally for groupings and such, otherwise to bring in prospectus..
rite now, i feel tortured. i hate it when im so damn vulnerable. shouldnt have started a single thing. shouldnt have met any online guys. i met one and i fell in love with him. met another one and im in a relationship with him. seems like i cant find a guy by myself - information technology leverages my relationship eh?
and the song by vanessa hudgens, it's actually displaying my thoughts on the computer screen.
suddenly, i wanna end everything and start anew. if there's a refresh button in my life, i wont hesitate to press it. even if it means gg thru the dark periods of my secondary skool life again. damn, the shadows of my past may never fade away, but so will the light which casts the shadows.
if i could go back in time, i wouldnt meet sugarbro. den i wouldnt be exposed to such high salary ranges and extraordinary pple. i'd rather continue toking to him on the phone till the wee hours. at least i wont be so stressed like i am now.
maybe if that happened, maybe the tears wouldnt have started on my bday.
if i could go back in time, i wouldnt say yes to alex so soon. den at least on my bday, i wouldnt shed more tears than i had.
if i could go back in time, i would directly stop myself in falling in love with that guy. at least i wont be so tong ku. it's just so damn painful and tiring.
but i know.
i cant go back in time.
i can onli move forward now. even if every step i take will increase the pain in my heart. I HAVE TO MOVE ON, don't i?
even if every single step brings more tears, at least im moving forward rite?
damn, why does my blog sound so depressing again?
or is it always that depressing to read my depressing posts?
have i reached my limit? just after 2 days of consistent mugging, rite now im having this nagging headache [been there since sunday nite], feeling rather feverish.. just stepped out of bathing and im shivering like as though im in north pole. any breeze from walking and moving just sends makes my goosebumps stand. now im not feeling that cold but the feverish feeling isnt gone.
last nite, my bro lent me high skool musical 2's dvd, so i watched it and did my revision for workplace skills at the same time. end up i just did the revision and listened to the songs. one song which hit me the most and stirred up the most thinking, is the song below.
Gotta Go My Own Way
by Vanessa Hudgens
Troy – listen...
I gotta say what’s on my mind.
Something about us, doesn’t seem right... these days.
Life keeps getting in the way.
Whenever we try,
somehow the plan is always rearranged.
It’s so hard to say,
but I gotta do what’s best for me.
You’ll be okay...
I’ve got to move on, and be who I am.
I just don’t belong here,
I hope you understand.
We might find our place in this world someday,
but at least for now,
I gotta go my own way.
Don’t wanna leave it all behind.
But I get my hopes up and I watch them fall every time.
Another color turns to grey.
And it’s just too hard... to watch it all... slowly fade away.
I'm leaving today
cause I gotta do what’s best for me.
You’ll be okay...
I’ve got to move on, and be who I am.
I just don’t belong here,
I hope you understand.
We might find our place in this world someday,
but at least for now,
I gotta go my own way.
TROY:
What about us?
What about everything we’ve been through?
GABRIELLA:
What about trust?
TROY:
You know I never wanted to hurt you.
GABRIELLA:
What about me?
TROY:
What am I supposed to do.......
GABRIELLA:
I gotta leave but I’ll miss you
TROY:
...miss you.
GABRIELLA LEAD, TROY AD-LIBS
So I’ve got to move on, and be who I am.
(Troy: why do you have to go)
I just don’t belong here,
I hope you understand.
(Troy: trying to understand)
We might find our place in this world someday,
but at least for now,
(Troy: I want you to stay)
I gotta go my own way.
I’ve got to move on, and be who I am.
(Troy: what about us?)
I just don’t belong here,
I hope you understand.
(Troy: trying to understand)
We might find our place in this world someday.
but at least for now,
I gotta go my own way.
I've gotta go my own way,
I've gotta go my own way
last nite, my bro lent me high skool musical 2's dvd, so i watched it and did my revision for workplace skills at the same time. end up i just did the revision and listened to the songs. one song which hit me the most and stirred up the most thinking, is the song below.
Gotta Go My Own Way
by Vanessa Hudgens
Troy – listen...
I gotta say what’s on my mind.
Something about us, doesn’t seem right... these days.
Life keeps getting in the way.
Whenever we try,
somehow the plan is always rearranged.
It’s so hard to say,
but I gotta do what’s best for me.
You’ll be okay...
I’ve got to move on, and be who I am.
I just don’t belong here,
I hope you understand.
We might find our place in this world someday,
but at least for now,
I gotta go my own way.
Don’t wanna leave it all behind.
But I get my hopes up and I watch them fall every time.
Another color turns to grey.
And it’s just too hard... to watch it all... slowly fade away.
I'm leaving today
cause I gotta do what’s best for me.
You’ll be okay...
I’ve got to move on, and be who I am.
I just don’t belong here,
I hope you understand.
We might find our place in this world someday,
but at least for now,
I gotta go my own way.
TROY:
What about us?
What about everything we’ve been through?
GABRIELLA:
What about trust?
TROY:
You know I never wanted to hurt you.
GABRIELLA:
What about me?
TROY:
What am I supposed to do.......
GABRIELLA:
I gotta leave but I’ll miss you
TROY:
...miss you.
GABRIELLA LEAD, TROY AD-LIBS
So I’ve got to move on, and be who I am.
(Troy: why do you have to go)
I just don’t belong here,
I hope you understand.
(Troy: trying to understand)
We might find our place in this world someday,
but at least for now,
(Troy: I want you to stay)
I gotta go my own way.
I’ve got to move on, and be who I am.
(Troy: what about us?)
I just don’t belong here,
I hope you understand.
(Troy: trying to understand)
We might find our place in this world someday.
but at least for now,
I gotta go my own way.
I've gotta go my own way,
I've gotta go my own way
23 October 2007
Stay The Same by Joey McIntyre
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVeyfQR3O8s
no way could i find a way to embed the song into this post~ so if you wanna hear this wonderful song, pls click on the link above~
Don't you ever wish you were someone else
You were meant to be the way you are exactly
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are
When you learn to love yourself you're better off by far
And I hope you always stay the same
'Cause there's nothin 'bout you I would change
I think that you could be whatever you wanted to be
If you could realize all the dreams you have inside
Don't be afraid if you got somethin to say
Just open up your heart and let it show you the way
Don't you ever wish you were someone else
You were meant to be the way you are exactly
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are
When you learn to love yourself you're better off by far
And I hope you always stay the same
'Cause there's nothin 'bout you I would change
Beleive in yourself reach down inside
The love you find will set you free
Believe in yourself you will come alive
Have faith in what you do you'll make it through
ohhh whoa whoa hey
Don't you ever wish you were someone else
You were meant to be the way you are exactly
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are
When you learn to love yourself you're better off by far
And I hope you always stay the same
'Cause there's nothin 'bout you I would change
No there's nothin 'bout you I would change
don't change
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVeyfQR3O8s
no way could i find a way to embed the song into this post~ so if you wanna hear this wonderful song, pls click on the link above~
Don't you ever wish you were someone else
You were meant to be the way you are exactly
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are
When you learn to love yourself you're better off by far
And I hope you always stay the same
'Cause there's nothin 'bout you I would change
I think that you could be whatever you wanted to be
If you could realize all the dreams you have inside
Don't be afraid if you got somethin to say
Just open up your heart and let it show you the way
Don't you ever wish you were someone else
You were meant to be the way you are exactly
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are
When you learn to love yourself you're better off by far
And I hope you always stay the same
'Cause there's nothin 'bout you I would change
Beleive in yourself reach down inside
The love you find will set you free
Believe in yourself you will come alive
Have faith in what you do you'll make it through
ohhh whoa whoa hey
Don't you ever wish you were someone else
You were meant to be the way you are exactly
Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are
When you learn to love yourself you're better off by far
And I hope you always stay the same
'Cause there's nothin 'bout you I would change
No there's nothin 'bout you I would change
don't change
19 October 2007
i think im kinda slow. dean has posted pics of my bday celebration on the 7th. i onli got to know abt it today, which is the 19th~
anyway, it's on Eunice's Birthday!!
budden, hai. i really need to slim down. and regularly get the face oil wiped off.
but now, im too lazy to even exercise~ lala~
i shall just starve until i have accumulated enough wealth to go for a slimming programme.
anyway, it's on Eunice's Birthday!!
budden, hai. i really need to slim down. and regularly get the face oil wiped off.
but now, im too lazy to even exercise~ lala~
i shall just starve until i have accumulated enough wealth to go for a slimming programme.
hi, missed me?
i guess not.
last nite, we had this depressing chat online and dear dear said that he was contemplating resignation.
[hm, i think the word "comtemplating" is more suitable for suicides. but, nvm.]
we always have generally depressing online chats. but hey, isnt life depressing?
today, dear dear told me that he just quit the job;
next nov last day.
and he owes the company a certain amt of money.
great, now everybody's strapped for cash.
well, almost everyone. sugarbro is now $47,000 richer for this month.
[i dun really like tabulating his commission statistics,
but hey, the numbers are rathering traumatising.]
i really want to help dear dear, but i dunno how to help him~
wanna help him lessen his load, financially and emotionally. but it feels like im actually adding to his problems.
i feel so useless and redundant. ;[
i cant help out in the payment to the company, and i am incapable of cheering him up..
stupid, useless, clumsy me.
17 October 2007
hm. today, went to mom to return EVERYTHING. every goddamn survey paper and survey list, and the laptop.
woohoo. a burden off my chest. REALLY. this stupid surveying thing has been weighing me down ever since i got the job. i hate the data entry part. i dun mind the part where the respondent actually toks abt his life story. i dun mind the part where i have to translate the whole eng survey into chinese. i just hate the part where i have to do data entry, go personal visiting, report to office twice a week, etc - anytime that takes up my time.
haha~
after that, went to skool.. accidentally met wanru and xinxian, walked around and chatted with them.. lecture.. do accounting with qian and nisa.. go home.
SIAN.
mugging time~
woohoo. a burden off my chest. REALLY. this stupid surveying thing has been weighing me down ever since i got the job. i hate the data entry part. i dun mind the part where the respondent actually toks abt his life story. i dun mind the part where i have to translate the whole eng survey into chinese. i just hate the part where i have to do data entry, go personal visiting, report to office twice a week, etc - anytime that takes up my time.
haha~
after that, went to skool.. accidentally met wanru and xinxian, walked around and chatted with them.. lecture.. do accounting with qian and nisa.. go home.
SIAN.
mugging time~
16 October 2007
hey...
woke up at 8am when alex dear msg-ed me. woke up, read his msg, felt a lil angry rising, went back to slp. i have enough troubles.
got out of bed at 10am.
liana called, and off i went to library@orchard until 8pm.. den left orchard at 9pm after having dinner with the peeps~
while i rushed to the library, i was at the escalator and kinda running up when i stumbled and fell rite smack on the escalator.
now, i have an injured forefinger, a raw knee and a hurting big toe.
and pple born in the year of 1988, this website is meant for you.
http://www.cashstream.tv/FortuneTeller_Dragon.php
woke up at 8am when alex dear msg-ed me. woke up, read his msg, felt a lil angry rising, went back to slp. i have enough troubles.
got out of bed at 10am.
liana called, and off i went to library@orchard until 8pm.. den left orchard at 9pm after having dinner with the peeps~
while i rushed to the library, i was at the escalator and kinda running up when i stumbled and fell rite smack on the escalator.
now, i have an injured forefinger, a raw knee and a hurting big toe.
and pple born in the year of 1988, this website is meant for you.
http://www.cashstream.tv/FortuneTeller_Dragon.php
15 October 2007
today is weird.
i received an unexpected call from wanru, asking me if i was free to go for lunch with her and her frens~ budden i was on my way to my group mtg, so no chance~
got another unexpected call from this china surveyor~ everything in chinese.. weird.
den sugarbro's unexpected call from geylang~ he was there to pay for his car~
den shandy's unexpected series of smses.. well, she got to know some things which i will never ever blog here~
budden alex dear no contact me at all ;[
i received an unexpected call from wanru, asking me if i was free to go for lunch with her and her frens~ budden i was on my way to my group mtg, so no chance~
got another unexpected call from this china surveyor~ everything in chinese.. weird.
den sugarbro's unexpected call from geylang~ he was there to pay for his car~
den shandy's unexpected series of smses.. well, she got to know some things which i will never ever blog here~
budden alex dear no contact me at all ;[
昨晚，我睡得很不开心。
一直在想着我跟他的问题。到底是不是问题呢？
他没有什么时间陪我，我也在忙着读书。已经快要两个星期没见面了。
好辛苦喔~
不过，我一直怀着总有一天可以见他的期望，庞望着那难得的一天。
好想抱一抱他，把我的力量传给他。也顺便感受一下他对我的爱。
我是自私的，我不停得要知道他爱我。不停的要确定他正在想我。
我觉得，只要他还对我有感情，那就够了。
真得够吗？
其实，我也不知道我到底要些什么。
--------------------------
今天，糖哥他电话给我。他听起来心情挺好的。
我看，他只会心情好的时候才会跟我联络~
讲了不久，我就跟他讲，"你好像还没跟我讲一句话哦~ 我已经等了十天哦~"
他想了一想，然后终于领悟到了。
他既然忘了我的生日。
太失望了。
一直在想着我跟他的问题。到底是不是问题呢？
他没有什么时间陪我，我也在忙着读书。已经快要两个星期没见面了。
好辛苦喔~
不过，我一直怀着总有一天可以见他的期望，庞望着那难得的一天。
好想抱一抱他，把我的力量传给他。也顺便感受一下他对我的爱。
我是自私的，我不停得要知道他爱我。不停的要确定他正在想我。
我觉得，只要他还对我有感情，那就够了。
真得够吗？
其实，我也不知道我到底要些什么。
--------------------------
今天，糖哥他电话给我。他听起来心情挺好的。
我看，他只会心情好的时候才会跟我联络~
讲了不久，我就跟他讲，"你好像还没跟我讲一句话哦~ 我已经等了十天哦~"
他想了一想，然后终于领悟到了。
他既然忘了我的生日。
太失望了。
能做到这些的男人..你一定要嫁给他... !
1.从后面抱着虾米一样的你睡觉
2.和你一起依偎在屋顶上看流星
3.给你洗所有的衣服,包括内衣
4.你生病的时候在你身边照顾你
5.保护你远离伤害和一切不好的东西(比如:烟,酒,毒品等)
6.烤各种味道的点心给你吃
7.一起做陶艺,然后用烤出来的花盆栽花
8.冬天用我的手掌温暖你冰棒一样的小手
9.带你走过细软的沙滩,看你白胖的小脚丫淹没在沙子里面
10.陪你过每个生日
11.有自己的院子,种你最爱吃的蔬菜
12.一起去海边看日落
13.给你足够的心灵空间
14.开着自己的车带你去郊游
15.一起逛街买你最喜欢的小食品和衣服
16.一起看电影听音乐
17.经常给你惊喜
18.学会一门乐器,给你演奏
19.睡觉前用体温把被窝捂热
20.一起把我们的新家涂成淡绿色
21.把你的朋友当成自己的朋友, 包括曾追过你的男孩
22.睡觉前给你把床褥铺好
23.每天睡前听我给你讲故事
24.把早餐准备好再吻醒你
25. 让你给我挑选衣服
26.夏天的早晨给你泡一杯冰冰的 柠檬茶
27.不让你一个人在黑暗的小路上行走
28.你伤心的时候把你搂在怀里,吻去你脸上的泪
29.一起锻炼身体
30. 一生中要买一个昂贵的礼物送给你
31.经常给你剪指甲和手上的小倒刺
32.不和你抢遥控器
33.学会煲汤给你补 身体,让你每次的"大姨妈"不会那么痛苦
34.永远不会让你吃醋
35.经常打开手机的电池盖看看你的大头贴
36.学习美容知识,专业呵护你的小脸蛋
37. 打电话时候面带微笑,相信电话那头你的能感受的到
38.送你一架钢琴,听你弹
39.无聊的时候陪你打游戏
40.陪你在烛光下吃哈根达斯
41.每天吃好睡好 ,不让你为我的身体担心
42.有一天带你去布拉格广场味鸽子
43.洗完澡后给你吹干头发
44.不许你盲目的减肥
45.自己种花送给你
46.陪着你一天天变老直到死去,并且来世还要找到你
强烈建议：
凡有男人能作到以上任意10条 那你就嫁给他吧，没错的
20条 你要努力得到他啊
30条 死皮赖脸也要跟着他
40条 拼了老命也要陪着他
50条 估计这种男人已经绝种了，据说天堂里有可能找得到
（这种男人你别说嫁给他了，就是亲眼看见过都是你的福分！）
1.从后面抱着虾米一样的你睡觉
2.和你一起依偎在屋顶上看流星
3.给你洗所有的衣服,包括内衣
4.你生病的时候在你身边照顾你
5.保护你远离伤害和一切不好的东西(比如:烟,酒,毒品等)
6.烤各种味道的点心给你吃
7.一起做陶艺,然后用烤出来的花盆栽花
8.冬天用我的手掌温暖你冰棒一样的小手
9.带你走过细软的沙滩,看你白胖的小脚丫淹没在沙子里面
10.陪你过每个生日
11.有自己的院子,种你最爱吃的蔬菜
12.一起去海边看日落
13.给你足够的心灵空间
14.开着自己的车带你去郊游
15.一起逛街买你最喜欢的小食品和衣服
16.一起看电影听音乐
17.经常给你惊喜
18.学会一门乐器,给你演奏
19.睡觉前用体温把被窝捂热
20.一起把我们的新家涂成淡绿色
21.把你的朋友当成自己的朋友, 包括曾追过你的男孩
22.睡觉前给你把床褥铺好
23.每天睡前听我给你讲故事
24.把早餐准备好再吻醒你
25. 让你给我挑选衣服
26.夏天的早晨给你泡一杯冰冰的 柠檬茶
27.不让你一个人在黑暗的小路上行走
28.你伤心的时候把你搂在怀里,吻去你脸上的泪
29.一起锻炼身体
30. 一生中要买一个昂贵的礼物送给你
31.经常给你剪指甲和手上的小倒刺
32.不和你抢遥控器
33.学会煲汤给你补 身体,让你每次的"大姨妈"不会那么痛苦
34.永远不会让你吃醋
35.经常打开手机的电池盖看看你的大头贴
36.学习美容知识,专业呵护你的小脸蛋
37. 打电话时候面带微笑,相信电话那头你的能感受的到
38.送你一架钢琴,听你弹
39.无聊的时候陪你打游戏
40.陪你在烛光下吃哈根达斯
41.每天吃好睡好 ,不让你为我的身体担心
42.有一天带你去布拉格广场味鸽子
43.洗完澡后给你吹干头发
44.不许你盲目的减肥
45.自己种花送给你
46.陪着你一天天变老直到死去,并且来世还要找到你
强烈建议：
凡有男人能作到以上任意10条 那你就嫁给他吧，没错的
20条 你要努力得到他啊
30条 死皮赖脸也要跟着他
40条 拼了老命也要陪着他
50条 估计这种男人已经绝种了，据说天堂里有可能找得到
（这种男人你别说嫁给他了，就是亲眼看见过都是你的福分！）
12 October 2007
爱你一万年 [刘德华]
小城故事
路边的野花不要采 [881减短版-福建语]
today, i went to MOM for the half-day training.. halfway during the session, i was struggling to stay awake oredi~ actually now, i dun feel like making a single phone survey. dammit. and i realise that i can onli get at most $500+, cant even afford a BP after the price change! and among all 3 plans, the price changed the least for GP~ increment by onli 480~
den i went for FSI lecture~ last lecture given by mr daniel tan!!! omg, how can i miss it sia. so i rushed down from clark quay ALL THE WAY to skool~ sian. had to lug lots of paperwork and survey forms and a laptop~ compared to the papers, the laptop is so much lighter~~ i really really really should bring a luggage around instead of a sling ba.
cant stop thinking abt alex dear.. WHEN CAN WE MEET AGAIN!? i miss his laughter. his cute cute laughter. i miss it when he smiles as me~ i miss holding his hand and feeling the roughness of his skin.. i even miss his voice.
HAI. tired.
anyway, so far, i got distinction for both FSI and FSCHS tests.. high distinction for FSCHS presentation and a PASS FOR WORKPLACE SKILLS.
the most dampening grade i see: PA. pass. just pass. moderate pass.
for WORKPLACE SKILLS.
the module i dislike most amongst all 4 modules.
lecturer, bleh.
contents, quite okae, veri interesting - maslow needs, etc.
that PA just pulls EVERYTHING down. im oredi kinda disappointed that i havent got a HD for the tests, and now a PA to demoralise me. THANK YOU!!
i shall go study FSI now~ the module with the thinnest and smallest book, which happened to be the most expensive among all the recommended-by-rmit books.. a B5-sized, 1cm-thick book which costs a lil above $80.
buai~
小城故事
路边的野花不要采 [881减短版-福建语]
today, i went to MOM for the half-day training.. halfway during the session, i was struggling to stay awake oredi~ actually now, i dun feel like making a single phone survey. dammit. and i realise that i can onli get at most $500+, cant even afford a BP after the price change! and among all 3 plans, the price changed the least for GP~ increment by onli 480~
den i went for FSI lecture~ last lecture given by mr daniel tan!!! omg, how can i miss it sia. so i rushed down from clark quay ALL THE WAY to skool~ sian. had to lug lots of paperwork and survey forms and a laptop~ compared to the papers, the laptop is so much lighter~~ i really really really should bring a luggage around instead of a sling ba.
cant stop thinking abt alex dear.. WHEN CAN WE MEET AGAIN!? i miss his laughter. his cute cute laughter. i miss it when he smiles as me~ i miss holding his hand and feeling the roughness of his skin.. i even miss his voice.
HAI. tired.
anyway, so far, i got distinction for both FSI and FSCHS tests.. high distinction for FSCHS presentation and a PASS FOR WORKPLACE SKILLS.
the most dampening grade i see: PA. pass. just pass. moderate pass.
for WORKPLACE SKILLS.
the module i dislike most amongst all 4 modules.
lecturer, bleh.
contents, quite okae, veri interesting - maslow needs, etc.
that PA just pulls EVERYTHING down. im oredi kinda disappointed that i havent got a HD for the tests, and now a PA to demoralise me. THANK YOU!!
i shall go study FSI now~ the module with the thinnest and smallest book, which happened to be the most expensive among all the recommended-by-rmit books.. a B5-sized, 1cm-thick book which costs a lil above $80.
buai~
11 October 2007
last nite, i slept at around 12 plus.
at 1.20am, my hp rang. and dammit, i actually woke up. if i didnt wake up, my bro would have died from panic and i wouldnt have to rush down to the carpark.
my bro's car had been broken into at m'sia. one window had been smashed and his bikes' keys were gone [dunno wad else were gone, but he onli mentioned the keys].. IN M'SIA.
and there he was, asking me to check if his bikes were still sitting nice and snug at their parking lots. and from my hse, it was impossible to see in the dark and thru the tree which was obstructing my view~ SO, i had to go down to the carpark, alone, sleepily and kuku-ly. in the first place, i answered a call which my phone couldnt recognise. i could have been in danger when i got down~
wah liao. i stand in front of the bikes, yawning and telling my brother "they are still there." and he was like, "sure anot? you know my bikes are which one ah?"
HELLO. IT'S NOT THAT IM THAT BAD AS A SISTER NOT TO RMB WAD VEHICLES HER BRO HAVE RITE!?
even though he had a van, has a car and 4 bikes [with one which he had long-lost the keys].
after that, i went up [veri quietly, my mother MUST not know wad happened otherwise she would go ballistic] and crept into my still-warm bed~
how the heck did i answer the phone?!
-----------------------------------------
next morning, MOM called. i got the job as telesurveyor. wanted to blog abt it, but no time to do so in the morning~ just now, while i was studying at the mac in science centre, i got justeducation's call. i got the POA job, means i will be doing the same things as shandy: do customer svc AND do some tutoring~ and start work after my exams~
means, i will get income from the two jobs, but not concurrently.. yea.
it's either i go buy an SP with the money i earn from the two jobs, or i go get a laptop. i think i go buy an SP. at least can get money back from the rebate programme AND give my sis the free 1050 min AND have the chance to shop on emall!! still got wad ah? dammit, i forgot wad other stuff i will get from buying the plan~ need to study more~ and wah liao, i will be buying it AFTER the price change! @#$#$%@#$!@$#^
AND I CANNOT LET MY MAMA KNOW THAT IM TAKING UP THE TELESURVEYOR JOB. otherwise when i buy the SP with the approx 1.2K i earn from that PT job, she will ask: where is the money ah? i wait until i get the rebates back den i tell her ;]
otherwise she will go "you still stupid, how to know whether can earn money? haiya, you stupid la. money throw in the sea. haiya, dun care you la. bloody swine. got money no give me, onli know how to spend."
eh. shit. she will know that there will be the money transfer INTO my bank account. cos she's holding onto the entire family's passbook. and there's no time to open a new bank acct. shit. ah heck. when she asks abt the transfers, i will tell her that i found a part time job!
den for the job at justeducation, i will set up a new account, get the pay sent to that new account, den i send around 80-90% of the pay to my current acct and let it be THE pay i get from working at just. den the remaining 10-20% i will stash away and let it slowly accumulate until i can afford an SP/GP.. to buy a GP, i will need YEARS sia. forget abt GP. for SP, i will need around 6-12 months sia~ by that time, still got SP or not?
hmmm... why not the money i get from MOM, i say that it's a fren of mine earning that money but she doesnt have a bank account and she still doesnt have enough money to pay as deposit? den "she" temporarily get the "company" to transfer the money to my bank acct? den i will draw out and "give her the money"?
wah liao, gotta spin such a big lie just to buy an SP asap. crazy. if i got to put in so much effort just to get an SP, do i give my life to get a GP?!
ah! i know!! IF mom veri nicely gave me the pay one whole shot, den i can say that i got a crazy rich fren who gave me the money as belated bday present and den i decided to take it out and return him? ahhhhh.... liddat i drag sugarbro into the story. cos he's the onli rich fren whom i mentioned to my mama. rich as in, earning-tens-of-thousands-a-month rich. not rich as in born-with-a-silver-spoon rich~
ahhhh... splendid idea. let's hope that MOM is THAT nice to me.
still, i need to open a new bank account in order to receive the rebates rite? yea.... i need someone to accompany me to open a bank account. SOMEONE. who hasnt meet me for DAYS. grrr~ or maybe, i dun even need to open a new acct, i can just use SOMEONE'S bank acct. eh no, i must have my own savings. wait he run off with my money, HAHA~ sorry dear, im not doubting your character.. it's a joke!!! okae, a bad joke.
ahhhh. i skipped today's lecture. and it was worth it. HAHA. i threw $70 into the ocean. [pple calculated: one lecture = $70~] managed to study a whole chapter abt conflict and negotiation.
and tmw, i hafta skip accounting class cos got the MOM training - they even give training allowance, around $20 - and den maybe half of the FSI lecture. dammit, i actually like FSI lecture and i had to miss the first half of the last FSI lecture. DAMMIT.
woops. training's at 8.30am at MOM HQ. and i still dunno how to get there. woops.
at 1.20am, my hp rang. and dammit, i actually woke up. if i didnt wake up, my bro would have died from panic and i wouldnt have to rush down to the carpark.
my bro's car had been broken into at m'sia. one window had been smashed and his bikes' keys were gone [dunno wad else were gone, but he onli mentioned the keys].. IN M'SIA.
and there he was, asking me to check if his bikes were still sitting nice and snug at their parking lots. and from my hse, it was impossible to see in the dark and thru the tree which was obstructing my view~ SO, i had to go down to the carpark, alone, sleepily and kuku-ly. in the first place, i answered a call which my phone couldnt recognise. i could have been in danger when i got down~
wah liao. i stand in front of the bikes, yawning and telling my brother "they are still there." and he was like, "sure anot? you know my bikes are which one ah?"
HELLO. IT'S NOT THAT IM THAT BAD AS A SISTER NOT TO RMB WAD VEHICLES HER BRO HAVE RITE!?
even though he had a van, has a car and 4 bikes [with one which he had long-lost the keys].
after that, i went up [veri quietly, my mother MUST not know wad happened otherwise she would go ballistic] and crept into my still-warm bed~
how the heck did i answer the phone?!
-----------------------------------------
next morning, MOM called. i got the job as telesurveyor. wanted to blog abt it, but no time to do so in the morning~ just now, while i was studying at the mac in science centre, i got justeducation's call. i got the POA job, means i will be doing the same things as shandy: do customer svc AND do some tutoring~ and start work after my exams~
means, i will get income from the two jobs, but not concurrently.. yea.
it's either i go buy an SP with the money i earn from the two jobs, or i go get a laptop. i think i go buy an SP. at least can get money back from the rebate programme AND give my sis the free 1050 min AND have the chance to shop on emall!! still got wad ah? dammit, i forgot wad other stuff i will get from buying the plan~ need to study more~ and wah liao, i will be buying it AFTER the price change! @#$#$%@#$!@$#^
AND I CANNOT LET MY MAMA KNOW THAT IM TAKING UP THE TELESURVEYOR JOB. otherwise when i buy the SP with the approx 1.2K i earn from that PT job, she will ask: where is the money ah? i wait until i get the rebates back den i tell her ;]
otherwise she will go "you still stupid, how to know whether can earn money? haiya, you stupid la. money throw in the sea. haiya, dun care you la. bloody swine. got money no give me, onli know how to spend."
eh. shit. she will know that there will be the money transfer INTO my bank account. cos she's holding onto the entire family's passbook. and there's no time to open a new bank acct. shit. ah heck. when she asks abt the transfers, i will tell her that i found a part time job!
den for the job at justeducation, i will set up a new account, get the pay sent to that new account, den i send around 80-90% of the pay to my current acct and let it be THE pay i get from working at just. den the remaining 10-20% i will stash away and let it slowly accumulate until i can afford an SP/GP.. to buy a GP, i will need YEARS sia. forget abt GP. for SP, i will need around 6-12 months sia~ by that time, still got SP or not?
hmmm... why not the money i get from MOM, i say that it's a fren of mine earning that money but she doesnt have a bank account and she still doesnt have enough money to pay as deposit? den "she" temporarily get the "company" to transfer the money to my bank acct? den i will draw out and "give her the money"?
wah liao, gotta spin such a big lie just to buy an SP asap. crazy. if i got to put in so much effort just to get an SP, do i give my life to get a GP?!
ah! i know!! IF mom veri nicely gave me the pay one whole shot, den i can say that i got a crazy rich fren who gave me the money as belated bday present and den i decided to take it out and return him? ahhhhh.... liddat i drag sugarbro into the story. cos he's the onli rich fren whom i mentioned to my mama. rich as in, earning-tens-of-thousands-a-month rich. not rich as in born-with-a-silver-spoon rich~
ahhhh... splendid idea. let's hope that MOM is THAT nice to me.
still, i need to open a new bank account in order to receive the rebates rite? yea.... i need someone to accompany me to open a bank account. SOMEONE. who hasnt meet me for DAYS. grrr~ or maybe, i dun even need to open a new acct, i can just use SOMEONE'S bank acct. eh no, i must have my own savings. wait he run off with my money, HAHA~ sorry dear, im not doubting your character.. it's a joke!!! okae, a bad joke.
ahhhh. i skipped today's lecture. and it was worth it. HAHA. i threw $70 into the ocean. [pple calculated: one lecture = $70~] managed to study a whole chapter abt conflict and negotiation.
and tmw, i hafta skip accounting class cos got the MOM training - they even give training allowance, around $20 - and den maybe half of the FSI lecture. dammit, i actually like FSI lecture and i had to miss the first half of the last FSI lecture. DAMMIT.
woops. training's at 8.30am at MOM HQ. and i still dunno how to get there. woops.
10 October 2007
heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
omg. today's wednesday.
and i havent had the time to even log into blogger to blog.
6th oct
i toked abt going to savh rite? well... after that val and i went to have lunch at city link's new york new york.. i didnt really wanted to eat, but hey, he's treating ;]
after eating, he was being over-crappy and we had conversations which made alex dear rather unhappy when i told him abt it~ sorry dear....didnt mean to make you upset~
after that, at nite i went to cineleisure. stupid, i saw shandy's msg wrongly. supposed to meet them at cathay cineplex. them as in A LOT OF PPLE FROM 05S13. wah liao, attendance was 17. the 8 gals from the '06 version of the s13 clique of mine + the 9 guys who came when there were class outings~
namely, duaiji, june, yiting, shandy, shaoqin, wanru, jialing, me, juntat, dean[he looked exactly the same as when in skool], chris, kwan hong [okae la, he's not a regular], danny [david didnt come, surprisingly], zhi kai [wah, he SLIMMED DOWN!], daren [i wouldnt have recognised him if we were walking on the streets], chantong [still being amazingly cute] and khai boon.
both kwan hong and khai boon expressed interest in working with me [at sunshine, budden i havent told them wad company im working for, which is me being veri secretive oredi].. budden kwan hong knew that i was in mlm the minute i asked him if he was interested in doing marketing with me~ amazing. you knwo why? cos he was in venture era but had quit after his disbelief in the mattresses pushed him to withdraw.. let's hope that he believes in emcall. dammit, who wont believe in such an incredible phone svc!? and he's said that this callback svc is veri interesting in the positive way, so there is hope that he will join. budden i didnt dare to push him too much cos he's a type 4~ sunshine pple should understand wad is a type 4 rite? yeaaaaa........... got this hunch that if i gave more info [which im allowed to disclose], he would shut down on me~
anyway, back to the outing topic.
we went to mind cafe! and omg, halfway during the games and food, suddenly everybody sung "happy birthday" and i kuku-ly started clapping and singing the first few verses with them until i realised that they were actually singing to me~~~~
so nice la~ haiiii... they made the previous day seem so faraway for a moment. it's like, 6th oct was my bday, not 5th oct. if i actually displayed my emotions completely, i could have cried sia~~~ no wonder a few moments before that, kb was asking "eh eunice, why you look so sian" and there was the time when ALL THE GALs left me with the guys~ tot i didnt notice rite!? i not that sotong k? you gals shake your bums and i know wad shit you all gonna shit out oredi ;p
and then they gave me a necklace which had my name engraved on the pendant~ budden i realise that when i wear it, it can actually slip off my neck without me noticing it~~~ so i dun dare to wear, just display for now~
den i go home, kana my mother's black face. and again, she screamed at me to get lost, etc etc. didnt cry this time. somehow, i wouldnt let her ruin my nite.
7th oct
my day actually started in the late afternoon cos before that, i woke up and started a futile research for my group project which was near due. so ms denise and mr tinglin were sms-ing me abt the grouping on that nite.. i kinda wonder why we're sms-ing each other and not using our free outgoing calls, but anyway..... denise said that it's at 5, tinglin said 7. den in the end, i reached at around 5.15, NOBODY WAS AROUND. den i stationed at popular and read thru some supposedly-self-motivation books. read thru quite a few thin books which didnt really help motivate me~ den i went to sit down at mos burger and mr chris and mr simon came to sit with me! so nice rite? haha~ soon, mr tinglin and huifen came [at different timings] and wethree went to have dinner at the nearby coffeeshop.. half of my plate was left untouched. IM SICK AND IM TIRED OF HAVING RICE CAKES ON MY PLATE.
den i drifted around office with huifen and two gals whom i got to know on the day i learnt rumenfa and another one guy which the duo had brought into sunshine~ den i saw sugarbro from afar, he signalled tinglin to go to his side, wanted to go and say hi, but he was with another bdm and he looked rather busy~ [there's the system such that when in office or infront of sunshine associates, i cannot call him "sugarbro" and should treat him with the "cordial respect" i treat every manager above my post]
and when tinglin came back, he passed me a paperbag which carried 3 items: 1 black "im lost in hk" shirt, 1 white "im lost in hk" shirt and one box of choc from hk disneyland~ apparently, the "thing" that sugarbro said will pass to me later in the nite.. apparently, he's so busy that he couldnt even pass it to me in person, hmph. he's the onli one who hadnt wished me a happy bday. hmph. my bday wasnt happy, so i guess i would explode on him if he did go "hey sugarmei, happy bday"..
den tinglin was saying that they had a headache which colour of the "im lost in hk" shirt to buy, so they settled for black and white~ so cute la!!!
imagine two grown men, standing and staring at a whole displayed array of "im lost in hk" shirts, rubbing their chins with their index fingers, frowning while talking to themselves "wad colour to buy for eunice ah? HAIYA, the black and the white one la!"
and wow, mr benny's grouping is wow.. he was talking abt GP, GP and more GPs.. den those aunties and uncles [whom mr sugarbro brought in] made comments, asked questions, etc. with their presence, it felt more like a BIP than a normal grouping session sia~~ den mr benny was telling them to let sugarbro know wad questions they have [and let him continue his piece, just stop bothering him - okae he didnt say that, but that was wad i was thinking]..
after grouping, sugarbro walked past me without even looking my way..... wah, ultimate. am i that short?
after EVERYTHING, i went home alone~ den i chiong-ed some more research for project before going to slp.
8th oct
ahhhh... monday. i was in ngee ann poly practically from 11am to 11pm, brainstorming with the group members. wad else can i say? my brain juice had been sucked dry. the dry-est ever.
9th oct
ahhhhhhhh.... tuesday. i went for job interview [in SIM] to apply to help MOM do surveys via phone and house visits~ after that, i crossed over to ngee ann for another torturous group meeting session.
and around 12.30, dear dear called me on the phone!!!
just nice i was being kinda missing him and thinking of calling him - budden he working and i dunno whether he can answer or not~
luckily for this time, group meeting ended earlier than expected: 6 plus, 7.
den we went to city hall area to walk walk, buy buy, eat eat.
and guess who i met?
MR TINGLIN!!!
he was on his way to meet a fren sia~ and i forgot to ask if the fren is male or female.. and i forgot to greet him "MR TINGLIN HAO!" infront of everybody~
after that, i went home alone.
reach home oredi, i vetted thru the group's report for assignment and made grammatical changes to the top half of the report [i had gone thru the second half previously].. after that i tried to forward the vetted copy to the group and i quickly shut down the com. sleeping monster had beckoned for a looooooooooong time. after that liana sms-ed me and asked why didnt i attach the file to the email.
wah, i wanted to bang myself into the wall sia. i had forgotten to attach the edited copy to the email before sending to the group! den i sian sian, curse curse, switched on the stupid com, waited for it to start up - ten minutes - and sent the email. WITH THE FILE.
today - 10th oct
another job interview for justeducation~ kinda tired to describe it now~
after that, went to skool.. met xinxian at the skool entrance sia~
she say i looked qiaocui and told me to take care.. weird, val oso said that i looked like i had shrunken when we met on monday morning. well, that was the first comment he gave for that day sia~
do i really look that bad? i think the depression i had on my bday really made its presence felt~
in skool, i tried blogging.. blog halfway den gotta go oredi~
den lecture. den i came home. den i bathed. den here i am blogging after dinner~
im sooooo gonna sleep. LATER. after i have revised today's lecture.
TATA!
omg. today's wednesday.
and i havent had the time to even log into blogger to blog.
6th oct
i toked abt going to savh rite? well... after that val and i went to have lunch at city link's new york new york.. i didnt really wanted to eat, but hey, he's treating ;]
after eating, he was being over-crappy and we had conversations which made alex dear rather unhappy when i told him abt it~ sorry dear....didnt mean to make you upset~
after that, at nite i went to cineleisure. stupid, i saw shandy's msg wrongly. supposed to meet them at cathay cineplex. them as in A LOT OF PPLE FROM 05S13. wah liao, attendance was 17. the 8 gals from the '06 version of the s13 clique of mine + the 9 guys who came when there were class outings~
namely, duaiji, june, yiting, shandy, shaoqin, wanru, jialing, me, juntat, dean[he looked exactly the same as when in skool], chris, kwan hong [okae la, he's not a regular], danny [david didnt come, surprisingly], zhi kai [wah, he SLIMMED DOWN!], daren [i wouldnt have recognised him if we were walking on the streets], chantong [still being amazingly cute] and khai boon.
both kwan hong and khai boon expressed interest in working with me [at sunshine, budden i havent told them wad company im working for, which is me being veri secretive oredi].. budden kwan hong knew that i was in mlm the minute i asked him if he was interested in doing marketing with me~ amazing. you knwo why? cos he was in venture era but had quit after his disbelief in the mattresses pushed him to withdraw.. let's hope that he believes in emcall. dammit, who wont believe in such an incredible phone svc!? and he's said that this callback svc is veri interesting in the positive way, so there is hope that he will join. budden i didnt dare to push him too much cos he's a type 4~ sunshine pple should understand wad is a type 4 rite? yeaaaaa........... got this hunch that if i gave more info [which im allowed to disclose], he would shut down on me~
anyway, back to the outing topic.
we went to mind cafe! and omg, halfway during the games and food, suddenly everybody sung "happy birthday" and i kuku-ly started clapping and singing the first few verses with them until i realised that they were actually singing to me~~~~
so nice la~ haiiii... they made the previous day seem so faraway for a moment. it's like, 6th oct was my bday, not 5th oct. if i actually displayed my emotions completely, i could have cried sia~~~ no wonder a few moments before that, kb was asking "eh eunice, why you look so sian" and there was the time when ALL THE GALs left me with the guys~ tot i didnt notice rite!? i not that sotong k? you gals shake your bums and i know wad shit you all gonna shit out oredi ;p
and then they gave me a necklace which had my name engraved on the pendant~ budden i realise that when i wear it, it can actually slip off my neck without me noticing it~~~ so i dun dare to wear, just display for now~
den i go home, kana my mother's black face. and again, she screamed at me to get lost, etc etc. didnt cry this time. somehow, i wouldnt let her ruin my nite.
7th oct
my day actually started in the late afternoon cos before that, i woke up and started a futile research for my group project which was near due. so ms denise and mr tinglin were sms-ing me abt the grouping on that nite.. i kinda wonder why we're sms-ing each other and not using our free outgoing calls, but anyway..... denise said that it's at 5, tinglin said 7. den in the end, i reached at around 5.15, NOBODY WAS AROUND. den i stationed at popular and read thru some supposedly-self-motivation books. read thru quite a few thin books which didnt really help motivate me~ den i went to sit down at mos burger and mr chris and mr simon came to sit with me! so nice rite? haha~ soon, mr tinglin and huifen came [at different timings] and wethree went to have dinner at the nearby coffeeshop.. half of my plate was left untouched. IM SICK AND IM TIRED OF HAVING RICE CAKES ON MY PLATE.
den i drifted around office with huifen and two gals whom i got to know on the day i learnt rumenfa and another one guy which the duo had brought into sunshine~ den i saw sugarbro from afar, he signalled tinglin to go to his side, wanted to go and say hi, but he was with another bdm and he looked rather busy~ [there's the system such that when in office or infront of sunshine associates, i cannot call him "sugarbro" and should treat him with the "cordial respect" i treat every manager above my post]
and when tinglin came back, he passed me a paperbag which carried 3 items: 1 black "im lost in hk" shirt, 1 white "im lost in hk" shirt and one box of choc from hk disneyland~ apparently, the "thing" that sugarbro said will pass to me later in the nite.. apparently, he's so busy that he couldnt even pass it to me in person, hmph. he's the onli one who hadnt wished me a happy bday. hmph. my bday wasnt happy, so i guess i would explode on him if he did go "hey sugarmei, happy bday"..
den tinglin was saying that they had a headache which colour of the "im lost in hk" shirt to buy, so they settled for black and white~ so cute la!!!
imagine two grown men, standing and staring at a whole displayed array of "im lost in hk" shirts, rubbing their chins with their index fingers, frowning while talking to themselves "wad colour to buy for eunice ah? HAIYA, the black and the white one la!"
and wow, mr benny's grouping is wow.. he was talking abt GP, GP and more GPs.. den those aunties and uncles [whom mr sugarbro brought in] made comments, asked questions, etc. with their presence, it felt more like a BIP than a normal grouping session sia~~ den mr benny was telling them to let sugarbro know wad questions they have [and let him continue his piece, just stop bothering him - okae he didnt say that, but that was wad i was thinking]..
after grouping, sugarbro walked past me without even looking my way..... wah, ultimate. am i that short?
after EVERYTHING, i went home alone~ den i chiong-ed some more research for project before going to slp.
8th oct
ahhhh... monday. i was in ngee ann poly practically from 11am to 11pm, brainstorming with the group members. wad else can i say? my brain juice had been sucked dry. the dry-est ever.
9th oct
ahhhhhhhh.... tuesday. i went for job interview [in SIM] to apply to help MOM do surveys via phone and house visits~ after that, i crossed over to ngee ann for another torturous group meeting session.
and around 12.30, dear dear called me on the phone!!!
just nice i was being kinda missing him and thinking of calling him - budden he working and i dunno whether he can answer or not~
luckily for this time, group meeting ended earlier than expected: 6 plus, 7.
otherwise i peng oredi.
den we went to city hall area to walk walk, buy buy, eat eat.
and guess who i met?
MR TINGLIN!!!
he was on his way to meet a fren sia~ and i forgot to ask if the fren is male or female.. and i forgot to greet him "MR TINGLIN HAO!" infront of everybody~
after that, i went home alone.
reach home oredi, i vetted thru the group's report for assignment and made grammatical changes to the top half of the report [i had gone thru the second half previously].. after that i tried to forward the vetted copy to the group and i quickly shut down the com. sleeping monster had beckoned for a looooooooooong time. after that liana sms-ed me and asked why didnt i attach the file to the email.
wah, i wanted to bang myself into the wall sia. i had forgotten to attach the edited copy to the email before sending to the group! den i sian sian, curse curse, switched on the stupid com, waited for it to start up - ten minutes - and sent the email. WITH THE FILE.
today - 10th oct
another job interview for justeducation~ kinda tired to describe it now~
after that, went to skool.. met xinxian at the skool entrance sia~
she say i looked qiaocui and told me to take care.. weird, val oso said that i looked like i had shrunken when we met on monday morning. well, that was the first comment he gave for that day sia~
do i really look that bad? i think the depression i had on my bday really made its presence felt~
in skool, i tried blogging.. blog halfway den gotta go oredi~
den lecture. den i came home. den i bathed. den here i am blogging after dinner~
im sooooo gonna sleep. LATER. after i have revised today's lecture.
TATA!
06 October 2007
so wad exactly happened yesterday? lemme recall..
from 12am onwards to the 12am of 6 oct, nisa(sim) yiting(pjc) june(pjc) shandy(pjc) sheryl(pjc) liqian(pjc, sim) valiant(ogk) lorraine(fmps, ss, sim) jiejie(sis) huiyi(fmps, ss) eugene(ogk) cherie(pjc) hagen(yahoo! pool) clarice(pfssg) henry(pfssg) evan(fmss) shaoqin(pjc) and denise (sunshine) sms-ed me "happy birthday"..
dear dear called me at around 12.30 and sung me a short bday song (again).. so cute la.. somehow, i love his laughter, veri cute. makes me wanna hug him everytime he laughs. den in the morning, he sms-ed me another bday msg ;] but anyway~
the whole day was..
mother put angbao into my hands when i was asleep. so secretive. i woke up after that and there she was scolding me for not having manners cos i didnt thank her for the angbao. didnt have the chance to even tok to her in the first place, how to thank her? after that i went out for group meeting in skool.
wore my pj uniform yesterday cos it's my birthday suit ;]
in skool, liqian and nisa wished me happy birthday [again] and gave me a "im not a plastic bag" bag!! kinda predictable la, before liqian took out the wrapped present, i oredi said "dun tell me you got that im-not-a-plastic-bag bag hor~"
haha
den cherry gave me a handphone keychain [even though my handphone cant dangle a shit] ;]
after lecture, went straight to toa payoh.. tinglin said that there would be a grouping, but the next minute he went "grouping postponed to sunday"... wahhhhhhh.. this particular grouping has been postponed for like, 1 whole wk?
once i stepped into mos burger, huifen went "happy birthday!" but not as loud as you peeps imagine k? den slowly slowly, pple i know from sunshine was going "happy birthday" + handshake ;] cos huifen, being the nice gal she is, told almost everybody that it's my bday~
and den tinglin asked, "you wearing pj uniform ah.....why no wear skool badge?"
btw, tinglin was from pj as well, 2002 batch~ and now he's in sim, 2nd year.. so he's actually my senior in every sense ;] budden he's sensitive to the word "old" so i went "wah, mr tinglin super senior ahhh"
and he said "dun say liddat leh~"
actually wanted to pass some cards to some sunshine peeps, but they werent around. actually, A LOT OF PPLE werent in office last nite.
and actually, i was abt to catch sugarbro in office, but before i finally went up to office, he had oredi left ;[ and den wanted to catch denise, budden she was at woodlands doing her cuff links~
so i decided to go home and rest.
on my way home, there was this handsome guy.... hansum like those taiwan idol drama guys.. den we look at each other.. wah, he so shuai. but i bet he's not as nice to me as alex dear. and wad are looks for when one's nature sux?
and den there was this ah soh who was frowning at my chest. maybe it's bcos my uniform is wearing thin. maybe it's bcos im wearing pink bra. maybe it's bcos she could see my bra. maybe it's bcos she is feeling inferior abt her own assets.. and den she looked me from head to toe.
i so wanted to say "auntie, 我有的，你也有。不过我知道，我有青春，你没有。"
and den i will laugh evil-ly as i leave the mrt cabin.
go home, ended up my mama said "you no manners. i hate you."
and den she started screaming and shouting that she hates me for not having manners, den for not caring abt her, den for not pleasing her.
and she said that she hates me, called me to go to hell, called me to get lost, told me that she doesnt need me, ordered me to kneel down for her forgiveness [i had to kowtow and i banged my head on the floor several times while chanting "sorry sorry sorry". yes i BANGED. the type of banging where you can hear "thud thud thud" a few metres away].
i forced myself to swallow my tears but there were the times when those waves of self-pity and despair just engulfed me and i had to whimper a lil~
after kneeling, i went to bath. sat on the toilet bowl and just let loose. let loose as in, cry out loud loud. but onli for a few moments before i told myself to stop crying.
and wow, in a split second, i stopped crying. but well, by that time my eyes were SUPER DUPER bloodshot and puffy like a puffed-up pufferfish.
after that i blogged those super depressing posts and i went to my room. screamed at my bro to come home on the phone [he was asking me whether he should come home or not] before i went into my room to cry some more. why cry some more?
cos i tried to call alex dear, budden he didnt answer.. and it wasnt veri late, it was 2323hr. den i felt more abandoned than before. cried till i was running out of tears, and feelings.
i fell asleep rather numbly and before i knew it, it was time to wake up to go do volunteer work for today's event..
today's white cane day, pple. a day where we celebrate the integration and socialisation btn the visually-handicapped and the society. went to city hall to distribute bookmarks with valiant.. distribute until sian. pple see me come up to them and they just NONONOONONONONONO. but there were the good ones, they let me stop them and accepted my bookmarks, some even reached for them wallets~ BUT NO, THE BOOKMARKS ARE Free Of Charge.
dunno why pple dun want to support the SAVH when it's even FOC.
from 12am onwards to the 12am of 6 oct, nisa(sim) yiting(pjc) june(pjc) shandy(pjc) sheryl(pjc) liqian(pjc, sim) valiant(ogk) lorraine(fmps, ss, sim) jiejie(sis) huiyi(fmps, ss) eugene(ogk) cherie(pjc) hagen(yahoo! pool) clarice(pfssg) henry(pfssg) evan(fmss) shaoqin(pjc) and denise (sunshine) sms-ed me "happy birthday"..
dear dear called me at around 12.30 and sung me a short bday song (again).. so cute la.. somehow, i love his laughter, veri cute. makes me wanna hug him everytime he laughs. den in the morning, he sms-ed me another bday msg ;] but anyway~
the whole day was..
mother put angbao into my hands when i was asleep. so secretive. i woke up after that and there she was scolding me for not having manners cos i didnt thank her for the angbao. didnt have the chance to even tok to her in the first place, how to thank her? after that i went out for group meeting in skool.
wore my pj uniform yesterday cos it's my birthday suit ;]
in skool, liqian and nisa wished me happy birthday [again] and gave me a "im not a plastic bag" bag!! kinda predictable la, before liqian took out the wrapped present, i oredi said "dun tell me you got that im-not-a-plastic-bag bag hor~"
haha
den cherry gave me a handphone keychain [even though my handphone cant dangle a shit] ;]
after lecture, went straight to toa payoh.. tinglin said that there would be a grouping, but the next minute he went "grouping postponed to sunday"... wahhhhhhh.. this particular grouping has been postponed for like, 1 whole wk?
once i stepped into mos burger, huifen went "happy birthday!" but not as loud as you peeps imagine k? den slowly slowly, pple i know from sunshine was going "happy birthday" + handshake ;] cos huifen, being the nice gal she is, told almost everybody that it's my bday~
and den tinglin asked, "you wearing pj uniform ah.....why no wear skool badge?"
btw, tinglin was from pj as well, 2002 batch~ and now he's in sim, 2nd year.. so he's actually my senior in every sense ;] budden he's sensitive to the word "old" so i went "wah, mr tinglin super senior ahhh"
and he said "dun say liddat leh~"
actually wanted to pass some cards to some sunshine peeps, but they werent around. actually, A LOT OF PPLE werent in office last nite.
and actually, i was abt to catch sugarbro in office, but before i finally went up to office, he had oredi left ;[ and den wanted to catch denise, budden she was at woodlands doing her cuff links~
so i decided to go home and rest.
on my way home, there was this handsome guy.... hansum like those taiwan idol drama guys.. den we look at each other.. wah, he so shuai. but i bet he's not as nice to me as alex dear. and wad are looks for when one's nature sux?
and den there was this ah soh who was frowning at my chest. maybe it's bcos my uniform is wearing thin. maybe it's bcos im wearing pink bra. maybe it's bcos she could see my bra. maybe it's bcos she is feeling inferior abt her own assets.. and den she looked me from head to toe.
i so wanted to say "auntie, 我有的，你也有。不过我知道，我有青春，你没有。"
and den i will laugh evil-ly as i leave the mrt cabin.
go home, ended up my mama said "you no manners. i hate you."
and den she started screaming and shouting that she hates me for not having manners, den for not caring abt her, den for not pleasing her.
and she said that she hates me, called me to go to hell, called me to get lost, told me that she doesnt need me, ordered me to kneel down for her forgiveness [i had to kowtow and i banged my head on the floor several times while chanting "sorry sorry sorry". yes i BANGED. the type of banging where you can hear "thud thud thud" a few metres away].
i forced myself to swallow my tears but there were the times when those waves of self-pity and despair just engulfed me and i had to whimper a lil~
after kneeling, i went to bath. sat on the toilet bowl and just let loose. let loose as in, cry out loud loud. but onli for a few moments before i told myself to stop crying.
and wow, in a split second, i stopped crying. but well, by that time my eyes were SUPER DUPER bloodshot and puffy like a puffed-up pufferfish.
after that i blogged those super depressing posts and i went to my room. screamed at my bro to come home on the phone [he was asking me whether he should come home or not] before i went into my room to cry some more. why cry some more?
cos i tried to call alex dear, budden he didnt answer.. and it wasnt veri late, it was 2323hr. den i felt more abandoned than before. cried till i was running out of tears, and feelings.
i fell asleep rather numbly and before i knew it, it was time to wake up to go do volunteer work for today's event..
today's white cane day, pple. a day where we celebrate the integration and socialisation btn the visually-handicapped and the society. went to city hall to distribute bookmarks with valiant.. distribute until sian. pple see me come up to them and they just NONONOONONONONONO. but there were the good ones, they let me stop them and accepted my bookmarks, some even reached for them wallets~ BUT NO, THE BOOKMARKS ARE Free Of Charge.
dunno why pple dun want to support the SAVH when it's even FOC.
05 October 2007
you peeps actually know how much i detest those kind of pre-celebrating and post-celebrating?
wad's the use of doing those when the day itself, isnt being celebrated?
wad's the use of saying, "happy belated ..." when it's oredi over?
you onli do those for your own convenience, dun you?
eg. birthdays
it's never bcos the birthday person has no time and cant make it to celebrate his/her bday, that pple pre- or post-celebrate his/her bday. it's always the pple around who postpone or bring forward the celebration just bcos they could finally make it. if pple just pre- and post-celebrate birthdays, wad's the use of the bday itself?
pls, next time if you intend to pre- or post-celebrate any occasions with me, pls dun. or if you really have the heart, just spin out a story or a lie, just dun let me know that it was to your own convenience that you're doing all these.
there's the other side of the story as to why there are the pre- and post-celebrations things, but rite now, i dun want to know and i dun want to mention anything to justify it.
justifying it, is just excusing it.
wad's the use of doing those when the day itself, isnt being celebrated?
wad's the use of saying, "happy belated ..." when it's oredi over?
you onli do those for your own convenience, dun you?
eg. birthdays
it's never bcos the birthday person has no time and cant make it to celebrate his/her bday, that pple pre- or post-celebrate his/her bday. it's always the pple around who postpone or bring forward the celebration just bcos they could finally make it. if pple just pre- and post-celebrate birthdays, wad's the use of the bday itself?
pls, next time if you intend to pre- or post-celebrate any occasions with me, pls dun. or if you really have the heart, just spin out a story or a lie, just dun let me know that it was to your own convenience that you're doing all these.
there's the other side of the story as to why there are the pre- and post-celebrations things, but rite now, i dun want to know and i dun want to mention anything to justify it.
justifying it, is just excusing it.
when i die, will you miss me?
will you cry for me?
wad will you do, for me?
---------------------
have you ever encountered one of those you loved most, saying that she hates you on your birthday. the day that you're supposed to receive the blessings and greetings from pple around you? yea, that day.
have you ever felt so damned lonely on the supposedly-happiest day of the year?
---------------------
while kneeling for her forgiveness, i was facing the window.
suddenly, the window looked so tempting. the knife left dangling near it looked divine.
suddenly, death seems so appealing.
---------------------
why is it always on my bday, that i end up crying? not out of happiness, i never cried bcos i was too happy or smth. but out of despair and hopelessness. and loneliness.
why is it always on the day that matters a lot to me, end up being one of the worst days of my life.
tonite, is the nite i cried the most. and i had to hide to cry.
maybe there'll be nites in the future where i cry even more.
--------------------
maybe i wont have anymore chance to cry. no more chance to blog. no more chance to laugh. no more chance to live.
maybe i should just go die. end everything.
isnt that just fabulous?
will you cry for me?
wad will you do, for me?
---------------------
have you ever encountered one of those you loved most, saying that she hates you on your birthday. the day that you're supposed to receive the blessings and greetings from pple around you? yea, that day.
have you ever felt so damned lonely on the supposedly-happiest day of the year?
---------------------
while kneeling for her forgiveness, i was facing the window.
suddenly, the window looked so tempting. the knife left dangling near it looked divine.
suddenly, death seems so appealing.
---------------------
why is it always on my bday, that i end up crying? not out of happiness, i never cried bcos i was too happy or smth. but out of despair and hopelessness. and loneliness.
why is it always on the day that matters a lot to me, end up being one of the worst days of my life.
tonite, is the nite i cried the most. and i had to hide to cry.
maybe there'll be nites in the future where i cry even more.
--------------------
maybe i wont have anymore chance to cry. no more chance to blog. no more chance to laugh. no more chance to live.
maybe i should just go die. end everything.
isnt that just fabulous?
04 October 2007
hai, disappointed. my mama actually remembered my birthday wrongly..
haha, no la.. she just so happened tot that today is the 3rd.. so she was like, "your bday not on saturday meh?" when i told her that im going to "celebrate" my bday tmw~
"celebrate" as in gg to office and distribute some stuff, stay and wander around office for a while and den go home. and im gonna take taxi home. hmph. taking the mrt alone veri depressing de.
haha, no la.. she just so happened tot that today is the 3rd.. so she was like, "your bday not on saturday meh?" when i told her that im going to "celebrate" my bday tmw~
"celebrate" as in gg to office and distribute some stuff, stay and wander around office for a while and den go home. and im gonna take taxi home. hmph. taking the mrt alone veri depressing de.
alex dear..... was rather disappointed when you said that you cant celebrate my bday with me again on sat... budden nvm, you are the first one to celebrate my bday with me!! as in PREcelebrate.....!
and den if you intend to gimme any bday surprise, lemme tell you that i'll be wearing my skool uniform to skool tmw and den after that im gg to toa payoh to distribute some stuff before i go home ;]
den on sat nite, i'll be with my jc galfrens! i think~ shandy has asked me to keep sat nite free..
and i realise that i wont be able to fully celebrate my bday with my family. it should be okae rite?? they oso dun really care abt bdays..
anyway, i havent bath.. and i wanna be clean and fresh on my bday. so i better go bath now~ tata!
and den if you intend to gimme any bday surprise, lemme tell you that i'll be wearing my skool uniform to skool tmw and den after that im gg to toa payoh to distribute some stuff before i go home ;]
den on sat nite, i'll be with my jc galfrens! i think~ shandy has asked me to keep sat nite free..
and i realise that i wont be able to fully celebrate my bday with my family. it should be okae rite?? they oso dun really care abt bdays..
anyway, i havent bath.. and i wanna be clean and fresh on my bday. so i better go bath now~ tata!
cannot take it. wanted to stop blogging for a while so that i can concentrate on my projects.. but i cat take it. i have to blog abt this.
sugarbro's income for september is officially $37,435.52/-
and by now, his income for this month is $11,319.20/-
and i bet he took out $33k to buy 3 GPs, and another $11k from to buy another 1 GP.
MAYBE~
oh maybe he used the whole lump sum to buy me a bday present.
HAW HAW HAW~ fat hope.
sugarbro's income for september is officially $37,435.52/-
and by now, his income for this month is $11,319.20/-
and i bet he took out $33k to buy 3 GPs, and another $11k from to buy another 1 GP.
MAYBE~
oh maybe he used the whole lump sum to buy me a bday present.
HAW HAW HAW~ fat hope.
03 October 2007
Three Steps to Choosing a Career
by Michelle Tullier
Monster Contributing Writer
A professional wrestler runs for governor of Minnesota and wins. The owner and pastry chef of my neighborhood bakery is a former investment banker. A friend from college who was a computer scientist for seven years now makes her living as a sailboat captain in Seattle.
How did these people get where they are today? Through a combination of luck, confidence and lots of self-awareness. As you contemplate where your own career might take you after college, it's impossible to know what opportunities fate may throw your way. What you can do, however, is identify your interests, talents and values, and then explore occupations that might make good use of them. If you follow the three-step process below, you won't just be sitting back waiting for careers and jobs to land in your lap. You'll be working toward discovering what makes you happy.
Step One
Figure out what makes you tick by asking yourself:
What sparks and holds my interest?
What do I do well?
What kind of personality do I have?
What's really important to me?
Take any career-related tests your college's career center might offer. Or think of times when you've enjoyed and excelled at a job, internship, class or aspect of your personal life. A great book to help with this process is Do What You Are by Paul Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger.
Step Two
Learn about your career options. Rarely do you have the opportunity to take a class in college that shows you what the work world is like. You have to take the initiative to explore it yourself. See if your college's career office has a library of books describing different kinds of work, the typical qualifications needed and the salary ranges for various occupations. Your college's career counselors should be able to help. Also, talk to people through informational interviews, and try out careers by shadowing and taking internships or part-time jobs.
Step Three
Sort out your priorities. After you've spent time on steps one and two, some of your strong preferences may start to emerge. You might learn you don't want to be in a corporate environment. That rules out investment banking. Or you might find that your interest in art wouldn't sustain a career, so you cross those types of jobs off your list. Whatever it is that you learn about yourself, you're making important discoveries that will help you choose a good career when the time comes.
Most importantly, keep it all in perspective: You don't have to live forever with any career decision you make now. Most people change careers several times during their lives, so the first job you choose right after college probably won't be your career 40 or 50 years from now -- unless you want it to be. So don't put too much pressure on yourself to make the perfect decision, and always keep your eyes open.
by Michelle Tullier
Monster Contributing Writer
A professional wrestler runs for governor of Minnesota and wins. The owner and pastry chef of my neighborhood bakery is a former investment banker. A friend from college who was a computer scientist for seven years now makes her living as a sailboat captain in Seattle.
How did these people get where they are today? Through a combination of luck, confidence and lots of self-awareness. As you contemplate where your own career might take you after college, it's impossible to know what opportunities fate may throw your way. What you can do, however, is identify your interests, talents and values, and then explore occupations that might make good use of them. If you follow the three-step process below, you won't just be sitting back waiting for careers and jobs to land in your lap. You'll be working toward discovering what makes you happy.
Step One
Figure out what makes you tick by asking yourself:
What sparks and holds my interest?
What do I do well?
What kind of personality do I have?
What's really important to me?
Take any career-related tests your college's career center might offer. Or think of times when you've enjoyed and excelled at a job, internship, class or aspect of your personal life. A great book to help with this process is Do What You Are by Paul Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger.
Step Two
Learn about your career options. Rarely do you have the opportunity to take a class in college that shows you what the work world is like. You have to take the initiative to explore it yourself. See if your college's career office has a library of books describing different kinds of work, the typical qualifications needed and the salary ranges for various occupations. Your college's career counselors should be able to help. Also, talk to people through informational interviews, and try out careers by shadowing and taking internships or part-time jobs.
Step Three
Sort out your priorities. After you've spent time on steps one and two, some of your strong preferences may start to emerge. You might learn you don't want to be in a corporate environment. That rules out investment banking. Or you might find that your interest in art wouldn't sustain a career, so you cross those types of jobs off your list. Whatever it is that you learn about yourself, you're making important discoveries that will help you choose a good career when the time comes.
Most importantly, keep it all in perspective: You don't have to live forever with any career decision you make now. Most people change careers several times during their lives, so the first job you choose right after college probably won't be your career 40 or 50 years from now -- unless you want it to be. So don't put too much pressure on yourself to make the perfect decision, and always keep your eyes open.
-saw this real good article-
Reach Career Success
by James Gonyea
Monster Contributing Writer
Why do you work? Are you successful at your work?
The answer to the first question is obvious, right? You work because you need to pay your bills and buy the many goodies life has to offer.
When you add the second question, however, the answer is more difficult to grasp and can reveal much about the wisdom of your ongoing career plans -- or more importantly, the lack thereof.
Where Do You Want to Go?
If you're concerned about career success, then it's imperative you clearly understand why you work. If not, how can you possibly know which steps will help you succeed? As Robert Campbell once said, "If you don't know where you're going, you'll probably end up somewhere else."
If you do end up elsewhere in life -- a place you didn't intend to be -- will you consider yourself successful? Not likely.
Define Success
How can you increase your chances of ending up in the winner's circle when you retire? Know why you work and how to achieve your work goals, and periodically evaluate how well you're doing in order to adapt your career plans as necessary.
So why do you work? Here, in no particular order, are the top 10 reasons clients have given me over the years as to why they work:
To earn a living.
To make a fortune.
To self-actualize or develop their knowledge and skills to the maximum.
To set and achieve goals.
To become famous.
To help others.
To pursue personal interests.
To travel and see the world.
To mark a place in history.
To earn a place in Heaven.
If you're like most people, you may identify with several items on this list. On the other hand, your own list may include 10 reasons not mentioned. Either way, the means of accomplishing your work goals varies from one objective to another. If your goal is to achieve a personal fortune, then the road you should follow is probably quite different than if your objective is to earn a place in Heaven.
Determine How to Reach It
No one reason listed above is better or worse than the others. But once you've identified your reasons for working, do you have a good road map in mind for reaching those goals? Have you examined the methods others have used to achieve success and applied their wisdom to your own career plan? Finally, have you established benchmark criteria that will indicate when you have reached career success?
These are questions only you can answer. Take the time to understand your career goals and find the most appropriate means to measure your success, and you'll already be on your way.
Reach Career Success
by James Gonyea
Monster Contributing Writer
Why do you work? Are you successful at your work?
The answer to the first question is obvious, right? You work because you need to pay your bills and buy the many goodies life has to offer.
When you add the second question, however, the answer is more difficult to grasp and can reveal much about the wisdom of your ongoing career plans -- or more importantly, the lack thereof.
Where Do You Want to Go?
If you're concerned about career success, then it's imperative you clearly understand why you work. If not, how can you possibly know which steps will help you succeed? As Robert Campbell once said, "If you don't know where you're going, you'll probably end up somewhere else."
If you do end up elsewhere in life -- a place you didn't intend to be -- will you consider yourself successful? Not likely.
Define Success
How can you increase your chances of ending up in the winner's circle when you retire? Know why you work and how to achieve your work goals, and periodically evaluate how well you're doing in order to adapt your career plans as necessary.
So why do you work? Here, in no particular order, are the top 10 reasons clients have given me over the years as to why they work:
To earn a living.
To make a fortune.
To self-actualize or develop their knowledge and skills to the maximum.
To set and achieve goals.
To become famous.
To help others.
To pursue personal interests.
To travel and see the world.
To mark a place in history.
To earn a place in Heaven.
If you're like most people, you may identify with several items on this list. On the other hand, your own list may include 10 reasons not mentioned. Either way, the means of accomplishing your work goals varies from one objective to another. If your goal is to achieve a personal fortune, then the road you should follow is probably quite different than if your objective is to earn a place in Heaven.
Determine How to Reach It
No one reason listed above is better or worse than the others. But once you've identified your reasons for working, do you have a good road map in mind for reaching those goals? Have you examined the methods others have used to achieve success and applied their wisdom to your own career plan? Finally, have you established benchmark criteria that will indicate when you have reached career success?
These are questions only you can answer. Take the time to understand your career goals and find the most appropriate means to measure your success, and you'll already be on your way.
02 October 2007
kinda worried abt sugarbro. he has been sick recently and according to him, life isnt flowing as smoothly as before [even though his paycheck disagrees].. wanna help him but i know i cant do much~ he dun tell me why he's vexed, and im not in the position to know why he's vexed since we onli know each other for around 2 months.. so once in a while, i shall sms and remind him that im still the sugarmei who will support him in every way.
-----------------------------------------
dear dear left this morning at around 7.15am~ hai, yesterday morning i woke up at 6.20am to send my mama off and i couldnt sleep after that. last nite i slept at 3.20am [i look at the time everytime] cos i was chionging project~
and since dear dear was taking up my whole bed, i slept on the couch~ slept for 3 hours, i automatically woke up and stretched.. wah, can hear so many bones crack sia~
and den dear dear volunteered to switch places with me [even though it was onli ten min before it was time for us to wake up]..
after that, he washed up and changed to his office clothes and i sent him to the door~
after that i slept for a while and poof, i gotta go to dohby ghaut to collect my bracelet and wedges... and den i went to imm to meet my sis for lunch.. had lunch at sakae sushi, but didnt eat much. suddenly, i lost my appetite.
den we went to giant to shop a lil, den we parted and i went to ntuc and shop a lil.. bought tiger beer! woohoo~ i so miss the feeling of being near-drunk.
okae, dun ask me why i wanna get drunk. i dun really wanna tok abt it here~
and i oso bought some stuff to give some pple on my bday ;]
-----------------------------------------
dear dear left this morning at around 7.15am~ hai, yesterday morning i woke up at 6.20am to send my mama off and i couldnt sleep after that. last nite i slept at 3.20am [i look at the time everytime] cos i was chionging project~
and since dear dear was taking up my whole bed, i slept on the couch~ slept for 3 hours, i automatically woke up and stretched.. wah, can hear so many bones crack sia~
and den dear dear volunteered to switch places with me [even though it was onli ten min before it was time for us to wake up]..
after that, he washed up and changed to his office clothes and i sent him to the door~
after that i slept for a while and poof, i gotta go to dohby ghaut to collect my bracelet and wedges... and den i went to imm to meet my sis for lunch.. had lunch at sakae sushi, but didnt eat much. suddenly, i lost my appetite.
den we went to giant to shop a lil, den we parted and i went to ntuc and shop a lil.. bought tiger beer! woohoo~ i so miss the feeling of being near-drunk.
okae, dun ask me why i wanna get drunk. i dun really wanna tok abt it here~
and i oso bought some stuff to give some pple on my bday ;]
rite now, dear dear is sleeping in my bedroom, on the floor~ told him to sleep on my bed since i gotta chiong project and have no need for the bed anytime soon, budden he scared kana caught by my bro.... so he's now sleeping on the floor~
and he brought my bday present [shall not say wad it is, kinda embarrassing] and a slice of choc cake from bengawan solo~
and there was the awkwardness of him singing a bday song solo~
and den he wore specs and didnt style his hair... so he was in his natural look, so cute!!! nerdy alex.
HAI, he thinks that mlm is scam.
-------------------------------
tired tired.. even though i wanna sleep, i shall at least squeeze a lil more brain juice out to finish up my part for the project.. dun wanna slow down the group again.
okae, i shall go back and chiong now.. see ya peeps!
and he brought my bday present [shall not say wad it is, kinda embarrassing] and a slice of choc cake from bengawan solo~
and there was the awkwardness of him singing a bday song solo~
and den he wore specs and didnt style his hair... so he was in his natural look, so cute!!! nerdy alex.
HAI, he thinks that mlm is scam.
-------------------------------
tired tired.. even though i wanna sleep, i shall at least squeeze a lil more brain juice out to finish up my part for the project.. dun wanna slow down the group again.
okae, i shall go back and chiong now.. see ya peeps!
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